Although the odds may not be favorable, these are the five best places to look around the house for lost weed.
The threat of catching coronavirus has millions of people hunkered down all across America. Some of this solitude is forced by states that have been hit the hardest by this disease, while other parts of the country are doing it out of sheer paranoia. Because while the virus was initially thought to only affect older people with underlying health conditions, we have since learned that it does not discriminate. The latest prediction shows that 200,000 Americans could die from this thing. So, for now, civilization is better off being placed on hold while science finds a cure.
For some people, being removed from society for months on end can make finding marijuana difficult. Sure, some legal states have allowed dispensaries to stay open, an effort intended to keep the masses from completely bugging out in this doomsday scenario. But pot lovers living in areas of prohibition — and, make no mistake about it, there are a lot of them — are not so lucky. These people’s dealers might be doing what they’re supposed to by practicing social distancing. Some of them may have even been forced into early retirement by this gnarly bug. This can bring on some tough times for the cannabis user in need, but what can they do if nobody’s holding?
It has been our experience that longtime marijuana users typically misplace a nugget or two at times. Although the odds may not be favorable, these are the five best places to look around the house for lost weed. We suggest going on a search and rescue mission before starting to panic.
It may have happened months ago, maybe even years, but there is a distinct possibility that, at one time or another, you dropped some weed into the couch cushions, leaving it to mingle with the popcorn, escaped change and other unidentifiable crumbs. If you happen to find a piece of weed in there, never fear, it is typically safe to smoke — that is unless it was left in damp conditions (maybe spilled beer) and has started to mold.
It is also worth mentioning that, when not stored properly, marijuana degrades over time. This causes the bud to lose some of its potency. So don’t expect to get too ripped on it if, by some stroke of genius, you manage to pre-date it to the early 90s. We’re not saying it won’t do the trick in a pinch, just don’t expect any miracles.
The Kitchen Floor
For those of you who keep your kitchen spotless, there probably isn’t much of a chance at finding weed on the floor. But the other group, the ones who avoid sweeping and sanitizing in between the cracks of countertops and other nooks and crannies, there is a slight possibility that marijuana can be found in there along with god knows what.
If you think back to those kitchen hangs where you and your buddies were in there packing bowl after bowl while a frozen pizza was baking in the oven, you might recall a time when someone might have said, “Oops, dang, where did the weed go?” Maybe you and your crew were too high to sniff out the lost bud at the time. Maybe the pizza was distracting. All we’re saying is that it wouldn’t hurt to investigate further to see if it’s still possible to resurrect it from pot purgatory.
Sure, the five-second rule has come and gone, but maybe you’ll get lucky and find it resting on a perfectly clean area on top of some dried pasta or something.
As long as you’re in the kitchen, you might as well check the refrigerator to see if there’s any weed in there. It is possible you dropped some pot inside the butter dish or vegetable crisper one night while scouring the fridge for munchies, but it’s not likely. There is a chance, however, that you’ve got some edibles in there that you forgot about.
They might have been tossed in the fridge over the summer after you took too big of a bite and then spent the rest of the weekend with a weed hangover. You might have even sworn off cannabis edibles for good, but being the weed fan that you are, you didn’t have the guts to just toss them in the trash.
Try looking in the side panels where people keep all the condiments they never use. But be forewarned: If you find some old marijuana edibles, be sure to check for an expiration date on the packaging. Some of them contain milk and eggs and can go bad over time. We’re already dealing with the coronavirus, we don’t need another strange virus popping up because someone ate bad weed.
Underneath The Bed
No, it’s not likely that you’ve been smoking weed in your sleep. We don’t know anyone who does that except for maybe Tommy Chong. But underneath the bed is one of the best places to find lost marijuana, and that’s because of the wake and bake factor. For some, this daily ritual is the only thing getting them out of bed in the morning. They might load a bowl or bong before hitting the sack, just to have it waiting on them when the alarm goes off, or they may wait to load it at the crack of dawn.
One way or another, though, some weed has probably escaped their clutches in those less than lucid moments and fallen under the bed. It doesn’t hurt to give it a look-see. And while you’re in there, go ahead and grab a nap. All of this weed hunting can be tiresome.
The Computer Room or Home Office
Maybe you always smoke weed there in the evenings when scouring your social media feeds for the latest news and gossip. Perhaps you keep a bowl of buds close by to inspire you to finish that novel you’ve been working on for the past few years. It doesn’t matter why, it’s just important to understand that the home office or computer room is a prime spot for finding lost nuggets of missing weed.
There might be some on the floor, underneath a stack of tax papers, or hidden in an old box, folder or sunglasses case. When it comes to the average toker’s office space, there is no telling where weed might be discovered. Sadly, if you don’t find any smoke in this spot, we regret to inform you that you’re SOL (Stoner Out Of Luck). It might be time to offer your dealer hazard pay.