Friday, April 16, 2021
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Teacher To Student: “Why Don’t You Lick Me Where I Fart?”

A Canadian high school teacher has been suspended and faces possible termination this week for allegedly berating students with questions like, “Why don’t you lick me where I fart?”

Jennifer Elizabeth Green-Johnson teaches 10th and 12th grade English at Ontario’s Dunnville Secondary School, where she has a history of inappropriate behavior with students. According to the Discipline Committee of the Ontario College of Teachers (vis US Weekly), Green-Johnson is being investigated for allegedly doing the following terrible things during just the 2015/16 school year alone:

  • told a student who brought coffee to class, “Get that fucking thing out of here.”
  • while talking to a student about a piece of gum, said, “Why don’t you lick me where i fart?”
  • called a student a “bloody pedophile”
  • told a student, “I have never said this to a student before but fuck you”
  • told students that a particular student would, “stare at my daughter’s ass”
  • told a student, “You mean a bribe? I’d be able to shit for a week ’cause of all that fiber,” after the student offered to buy her muffins in exchange for a passing grade
  • told her class that a female student “looked like a frumpy old lady”

A truly impressive year for this awful, awful teacher! Her punishment for this supremely messed-up behavior was a six-day suspension, which she served in February. She was also suspended for an incident in 2011, when she asked a male student who’d she caught wrestling with another male student, “So you like it from behind?” That same year, she reportedly said you couldn’t see a certain actor’s penis “without a microscope,” threatened to physically strike students for not sitting down, and “made accidental contact with (a student’s) groin, causing him to fall to the ground in tears.”

Green-Johnson, who has also been suspended for a month without pay, will face the Ontario College of Teachers on Friday. The Toronto Starnotes that the college can revoke Green-Johnson’s teaching certificate, which seems like they least they should do.

One lingering question for us: aren’t all Canadians supposed to be nice?

Posted By: Taylor Berman


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