Saturday, October 1, 2022

The ‘Blade Runner 2049’ Trailer Is Here, Please Catch This Hype Train

Please jump aboard this hype train. Our destination? Blade Runner 2049, a movie so tantalizing in its first look I’d jump into a freezing chamber right now until October 6, 2017 if I had the option.

But let’s stop talking about possibilities and instead focus on realities. Ostensibly, Blade Runner 2049 is a sci-fi thriller returning us to neo-noir Los Angeles. There, humans and humanoid robots called Replicants are indistinguishable from one another, the artificial and real inseparable (You know, sort of like, Los Angeles now). Police officers called blade runners hunt down the renegade Replicants to maintain peace and order.

In this Hollywood climate of recycling existing IPs or building out the *extended cinematic universe* a dread hovered over Blade Runner 2049. When this film was announced, it was like, how many Harrison Ford vehicles from the 80s are we really gonna run back?

My response to my own hypothetical after watching this trailer: Run that shit back.

Ryan Gosling plays a new blade runner mysteriously named K, who’s uncovered a secret that could ruin the world, or what’s left of it. This discovery leads him to Rick Deckard (Harrison Ford), where I’m sure nothing *complicated* will happen.

Gosling’s doing that glazed, slack look on his face thing he does so well, messaging he’s both emotional fragile and/or dead inside. Nicolas Winding Refn tapped into it on modern classic Drive, establishing Dark Ryan Gosling who is the best Gosling. Dark Gosling also appears in Only God Forgives (where Refn tries not to remake a more brooding Drive with Thai gangsters but accidentally remade a more brooding Drive with Thai gangsters) and The Place Beyond the Pines (21 Savage is jealous of those face tats). Though we are very partial to Goofy, Lovable Gosling (The Nice Guys, Crazy, Stupid Love) and Smooth-Talking Eye Candy Gosling (The Big Short, The Ides of March) as well.

Screenshot via Warner Bros. Pictures/YouTube

Meanwhile, how wonderful is that Harrison Ford decided to try again? Watching Ford in Cowboys & Aliens and Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull always felt like he filmed his scenes after his old man afternoon nap. He was cashing those checks, as they say. But temporarily forgetting our beef with JJ Abrams, Ford was really good in The Force Awakens! Dude went for it, throwing his body around, delivering those low-key cheesy lines with believable verve. The Force Awakens, despite its many derivative faults, showed us Ford’s still got it.

Look, this trailer is so totally consuming I forgot Jared Leto will be in Blade Runner 2049. Adding Leto into this equation of Full Effort Ford, Dark Gosling, plus director Denis Villenueve (on a serious win streak with Sicario and Arrival) is pure catnip. I hope Leto is a Replicant and went so method he actually convinced himself he was a robot. Then, still in method mode, he accidentally fucked a Roomba.

Please catch this Blade Runner 2049 hype soon. Once it leaves the station, it’s going to be a runaway train.


The most essential daily news, entertainment, pop culture, and culture coverage. Want more? Check out “A Study Of 2016: The Year America’s Pop Stars Went Weird,” “Southwest Pilot Congratulates Passengers For Drinking Every Last Drop Of Booze On Board,” and “13 Christmas Hip-Hop Songs You Need For The Holidays




How Marijuana Could Worsen Symptoms Of Depression

A recent study found people with depression were double the risk of using marijuana than those without, and were more likely to consume at a near-daily rate.

Don't Miss Your Weekly Dose of The Fresh Toast.

Stay informed with exclusive news briefs delivered directly to your inbox every Friday.

We respect your privacy. Unsubscribe anytime.