Sunday, December 22, 2024

This Vibrator Bangs Out Merry Christmas Carols For Your Enjoyment

Mysteryvibe is a company from the UK that makes sex toys which can be tailored and improved with an app, allowing you to download different rhythms into your “special friend.” Crescendo, their coolest vibrator, can be curved and molded into any shape you want. It can also vibrate to the rhythm of “Jingle Bells,” because it’s Christmas and why the hell not.

MysteryApp is pretty great, because it allows you to personalize your device in ways that are truly unique, giving you the chance to make your own vibrating patterns and “listen” to different kinds of playlists. Like a kinky iPod.

Feeling like you can vibe off to Boyz 2 Men? Go for it. Christmas carols? Sure thing. MysteryApp’s holiday inspired tunes were secretly released in December, and they include an impressive catalogue of songs, or whatever you want to call them. We’re not sure of the appropriate terminology here. If you own the Crescendo, you can download Jingle Bells, Deck the Halls, Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer, and many others, giving you the opportunity to orgasm to the vibrations of several Christmas classics. Can’t say you’ve done that before, right?

If you feel a little weird when it comes to masturbating to the rhythm of a holy song, you can just use the vibrator to play around and try to guess what song is “playing”. It could be like vibrator trivia. Very family friendly and appropriate for Christmas.

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