Nothing is sacred and social media ruins friendships. You know how many real friends I have on the internet? No clue. If you’re reading this hopefully you’re my friend. Real friends, how many of us?
No that’s not a slick Kanye reference, my (real) friends. That’s the question troubling the internet this week as Drake Bell and Josh Peck–they of Nickelodeon’s Drake and Josh fame–have been feuding. Not beefing, because all celebrity beefs occurring after 2010 are fake. This is a feud and a worrisome one at that. If the Drake and Josh feud can’t be worked out, what can?
It started in rather commonplace manner: Josh apparently didn’t invite Drake to his wedding. Josh married long-term girlfriend Page O’Brien in Malibu this past weekend. He invited former Grandfathered co-star John Stamos, but no Drake. In since-deleted tweets, Drake wrote: “True colors have come out today. Message is loud and clear. Ties are officially cut. I’ll miss you brotha.”
Josh Peck got married yesterday and Drake Bell just tweeted this ? my favorite childhood tv show brothers pic.twitter.com/Xqq0AoLuOD
— Amber Leeann Batchelor (@AmbySecrest) June 18, 2017
Ouch. Including the iconic Drake and Josh catchphrase of “brotha” stings. Or something like that.
Here’s how we know the feud is real: Camps leaked comments to the tabloids. Allegedly Drake was further hurt because Josh invited Drake and Josh producer Dan Schneider. How you gonna invite someone from a show and it’s not the guy with his name in the title? Huh, Joshy? “Drake was upset that Dan Schneider was there,” an insider told Us Weekly. “Because he and Josh were friends years ago, he thought he would have gotten an invite, even though they never talk.”
Don’t worry, this feud gets pettier.
In a recent podcast interview, Josh relayed how he’s always gets questions from fans regarding Drake. What’s he doing? What is he up to? Where is he that isn’t by your side? Josh said, “I go, ‘I wish I had a better answer but probably at home. Whole Foods?’”
Is the “Whole Foods” line a diss? It feels like a diss.
In a huge celebrity news scoop, Us Weekly reported this week Drake never congratulated Josh on his engagement, which might explain the lack of an invite. And they say journalism scoops don’t exist in this business anymore…
Related Story: Get High And Watch Movies With Your New Internet BFFs
Anyways, Josh was “really hurt” by Drake’s tweets and told wedding guests he and Drake “hadn’t spoken in years.” Whoever thought that celebrity was a giant sham of mediated, fake relationships posited for camera’s sake? Not this guy, that’s who. So this news hurts in the way that sweet tooth does. I’m ashamed of myself, feel gross, and not in any real pain whatsoever.
Drake and Josh should be friends again because the internet wants that and the internet should get what it wants. If they don’t make up, I got three words. Hug me, brotha.