Approximately 40 to 50%of adults are shy, which makes it harder to find the special someone
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Shyness and social anxiety can go hand in hand. Â Social anxiety is the fear of social situations involving other people, with a focus on “being embarrassed, humiliated, rejected or looked down on in social interactions.” But this is not fully a barrier to finding a bestie, a partner or even just a lover.
Before you start, make a list of the best qualities friends and family share about you. It will take you into the connections/messaging/chatting with a positive vibe. Know your worth of before you find someone special, it will give you a better space to start.
Also, narrow what you want in a partner, it gives you a better focus as you interact with others. Â Maybe 3-4 things so you have a solid base.
Get to know the different apps
One thing which diminishes stress and the feeling of being out of control is research. Before you start swiping get to know the different dating apps, specially those that are designed with shy or anxious people in mind. While these apps might have a smaller user base than Tinder, they might adapt better to your needs. In research find out the best tips for profiles, responses, etc.
Get help from friends when setting up your profile
Every person is different when it comes to managing anxiety. While some prefer to keep it to themselves or journal it out, others seek the help of their friends and family members. Don’t doubt yourself or feel embarrassed when setting up your profile; ask friends and family on their opinions and allow them to help you choose an interesting bio and some flattering pictures. Â Also, ask opinions on when and how to share information to others online.
Set some boundaries
While dating apps help break the ice, it’s very common for people to chat with hundreds and never go on a date. Set some time limits and don’t let yourself chat with people with no discernible goal in sight. Dating apps are for dating, which means that at some point you’re going to have to meet this person face to face. It’s also important to prevent your dating app use to intrude on your day to day life. Avoid using the app while working or when doing something you normally enjoy. If you need some help in keeping track of your app use, enable your smartphone time management feature. This tool will limit your time on the app, setting up a fixed amount of minutes per day that block the app once you’ve been there for too long.
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Use the chat option to take pressure off the first date
One of the best parts about dating apps is the fact that you can get to know the person you’ll be meeting before a face to face encounter. Take advantage of all chatting and text messaging by taking your time to come up with questions and answers without having the pressure of a stranger waiting for the perfect response. Â But a warning, don’t go too long just chatting, it can set unrealistic expectations when you do finally meet in person.
Take breaks
Breaks are very helpful for all sorts of dating app users. While dating around and chatting with people can be very fun, rejection is also almost always part of the equation. Know this might happen at any moment and you might spend weeks swiping around without having a match. Take a break and then jump back in.
