Wednesday, April 24, 2024

People In This Small English Town Are Worried About ‘Graveyard Sex’

Residents of a small town in England are worried that a proposed new wine bar would lead to unspeakable behavior, including more graveyard sex (you read that correctly, more graveyard sex).

This is all going down in the town of Ware, Hertfordshire, where locals gathered at a public forum to voice their concerns over plans for a wedding shop to transform into a wine bar.

The fear here is that once people get all sauced up on wine, they’re going to go crazy, specifically in the (g)raveyard. And also, drunks rolling around in their own urine like pigs in mud. And according to the Hertfordshire Mercury, council members also shared their fears, including the fact that the wine bar would ‘attract people from Enfield,’ a borough 15 miles away in north London.

One resident who lives nearby told the Hertfordshire Mercury:

In the graveyard I’ve seen people having sex, we’ve had people weeing in our doorway, we’ve seen ladies in the alleyway opposite squat weeing, falling over and rolling in their wee — and that’s just with the current bars that are there. If more are introduced, especially an establishment so big that could cater for so many more customers, we are really concerned that that will adversely impact what is happening outside.

Another resident said that problems in the graveyard have been ongoing for years and that having a wine bar that could potentially add to that hooligan behavior ”is just not even worth thinking about.”

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District councilman Mark Pope agreed the building is not suitable, by way of it’s sheer mass: “I’d be concerned as to what is happening elsewhere in the premises because it’s one hell of a wine bar, more than 3,000, 4,000 square feet.”

Other council members said police didn’t have the manpower to deal with more ruffians. And that the building where the wine bar would be located is ‘not considered suitable,’ and that it would make for better office space.

A change of use application to convert Rankin House, the former home of the Clifford Burr bridal shop, has been submitted to the council, whether they like it or not.

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