Friday, April 19, 2024

Bottoms Up ‘Merica: Here’s Your Ultimate Inauguration Day Drinking Game

Inauguration Day is sneaking up on us and we can’t think of a better time to introduce a new drinking game. With Friday the 13th already out of the way (if you are reading this, it means you survived, so congrats on that) this handy-dandy new game (and suggested beers to match), will help you survive Friday the 20th. Good luck!

Ingredients:

  • Rolling Rock Tall Cans (12)
  • Sierra Nevada Pale Ale (12)
  • Newcastle Brown Ale (6)
  • Stella (6)
  • Your favorite local beer (6)
  • Solo Cups (12)
  • Deck of cards (1)
  • Dice (2)

Rules:

Step 1:

The day starts early – 6am for you west coasters – that’s practically Macy’s Day Parade territory. But fear not, we’ll have you tipsy, happy and resting peacefully before the day is done. Here’s what to do:

Sleep as late as you can, eat a big breakfast and relax your mind. It’s going to be a long day and (potentially) a long four years. Don’t blow a fuse today. Call a friend over, maybe a couple, and play cards. Something simple (maybe gin rummy, but definitely not WAR!) and talk about your hopes and dreams and fears. Get it out there.

Step 2:

Okay, it’s the afternoon now. Time to get to it. Put on your favorite news channel and take in the scene. Assign 1 drink (maybe a sip of beer) for:

  • Images of limos
  • American flags
  • Foreign flags
  • Waving and smiling politicians
  • Mentions of Hilary Clinton
  • References to Obama’s post-presidential career

This will bring some levity to the room. Inevitably someone will shout and point, “Oh they talked about Obama hosting a podcast! Oh, they just said Barak is going to be the new NFL Commissioner. Drink!”

Step 3:

Refine your assignments right before the swearing in. Choose three terms to pay attention for, like:

  • Donald Trump’s hair waving in the wind
  • Mike Pence squinting in the D.C. sun
  • A Rockette pulling a Kaepernick

And every time one occurs, take your dice and roll (either 1 or both, depending on the number of people in the room) and the number that comes up is the number of drinks you get to pass around to your friends. But be careful, if you pick on someone, they’ll likely get you back (it’s the old drinking game rule: a die for a die).

Step 4:

But what are the Solo cups for? Good question! It’s Flip Cup time!

Nothing gets a room moving like a rousing game of F.C. It’s just about the simplest game you can play, which is good because by now you’re somewhere between buzzed and hammered. So split off into teams and find the edge of a table and set those cups on it. It’s this sort of fun, goofy entertainment that will keep people together during a changing political era, no matter your politics.

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