If this strategy worked, a lot more passed-out drunk dudes would have their lives fixed overnight.
Cliff Pryor, a 27-year-old Florida resident — in the most reasonable and logical Florida Man moment of 2016 — took a creative path toward getting his pothole-covered street fixed. He drew a dick on it.
Who can blame him for trying? He was inspired by the British version of Banksy, an anonymous artist known as ‘Wanksy,” who also took upon his shoulders the great, throbbing burden of civic duty by drawing penises around potholes. In that case, the city fixed the potholes right away, after some rebuke from the city council: “Has this person, for just one second, considered how families with young children must feel when they are confronted with these obscene symbols as they walk to school?”
Florida is apparently just as squeamish about seeing a spray-painted penis on the sidewalk. They’re not cool with people riding manatees, or prank pizza calls, and they’re definitely not chill about with this.
While the UK masked crusader finished his mission and drifted into anonymity, our personal Wanksy got busted. Cops came across the artistic vigilante in the act, according to the Florida Sun Post, early on a Friday morning when a cruiser pulled up behind him mid-spray. They nailed him with a criminal mischief charge.
Pryor is “unrepentant,” the Sun Post reports, speaking out to local journalists about his stance against potholes. He believes that his actions could save someone from a flat tire or accident. And indeed, within 24 hours, his artwork was filled in. He’s not the hero that we want, and probably not even the hero that we need. But he is definitely the hero we deserve.
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