Ghosting is one of the more annoying phenomena of dating. If you’re not familiar (lucky you!), ghosting is when someone disappears on you, rather than having the uncomfortable conversation about why they don’t want to see you anymore. But a new study reveals that those who choose ghosting over other humane routes of actual communication aren’t necessarily cowards, they are true believers in soul mates.
Yup. As if finding “the one” is any more believable than actual ghosts.
Gili Freedman, a postdoc at Dartmouth college in New Hampshire, aimed to find out why people “ghosted” by giving questionnaires to more than 500 men and women that would reveal their beliefs about destiny and ghosting. According to Psychology Today, about a quarter of respondents reported having been ghosted in the past, with about one-fifth of respondents reporting that they had been the ones to ghost.
What’s more, volunteers with strong beliefs in destiny were more likely to think it was OK to end a relationship by ghosting, compared to those with weaker beliefs in destiny: 22% more likely in the case of a short-term relationship; 63% more likely in the case of a long-term relationship. Growth beliefs weren’t related to feelings about the acceptability of ghosting a short-term partner, but believers in growth were 38% more likely than non-believers to think it acceptable to ghost a long-term partner.
Freedman believes the results are “consistent with the possibility that destiny theorists [people who believe that the ideal relationship partner is our “soul mate”] are more likely to act decisively on their relationship once deciding it is not ‘meant to be.'”
Translation? Why give any attention to someone who serves no purpose in your romantic life. I mean, who needs friendship, right?