If you’re a cannabis user and are in the dating pool, a lot of the time you’ll find yourself gravitating toward other weed imbibers. There might be someone in your circle of friends you’ve had an eye on or perhaps an acquaintances who you’d like to know better. But sometimes that spark happens from across a crowded room, eyes meet and then so do the two of you.
Sparks fly between people of all proclivities and sometimes, even if it’s an emotional, mental and physical match, it may not be a weed match. If you meet someone and can’t get enough of them, whether they use marijuana or not, you may need to have an engaging conversation, not to explain yourself, but to educate. Not everyone’s gotten the memo that reefer madness has gone by the wayside.
The last thing you want to do is keep your cannabis use a secret for long. Maybe it’s not in the first conversation, but it should come up in a timely manner, especially if you’re in the cannabis lifestyle. This can be a sticky situation where marijuana is yet illegal for any type of usage and where stigma still swirls.
Make sure that when you do break the green ice that you’re doing so in a stand-up manner. One of the greatest concerns among non-users is that pot makes people lazy, disinterested or a stay at home stoner. Highlight your active life and when you do bring it up, talk about how cannabis enhances many of your day to day activities, rather than hinders them. And if you use it medicinally, be as open as you can about why.
If you’ve been dating someone for a few weeks and still need to bring it up, pointing out that you’ve not been abstaining during that time may help or backfire, depending on the person. They may feel let down that you waited to say something or they may feel pleasantly surprised because the stereotypes don’t apply.
You can start the convo with a question, “Hey ______, have you ever smoked weed?” is a simple, casual starter. Listen to the lilt of their voice when they answer. If it goes up with a yes – or no – you’re likely in the clear. If it goes down in unmasked disdain, you may want to drop the mostly casual attitude and start the next sentence with, “That’s cool. I myself enjoy it/use it for…” and start an honest discussion.
Hopefully the sparks still sizzle and you’ll have opened up a new realm to the budding relationship. Some people aren’t going to come around though, and pot smoking/vaping/ingesting may be a deal breaker. If so, keep your chin up and smoke a conciliatory jay when you get back home. There are plenty of buds in the field and you can rest easy knowing that you were honest, both to them and to yourself.