You’re most likely not taking your sweetheart to a dinner date at a fast food joint tonight, but if you are, there’s no shame in that game. Don’t bag the doggy bag: Here are some of our favorite lowkey restaurants that are pulling out the greasy, fried stops for Valentine’s Day.
KFC Chicken Gram
Nothing says “I love you” quite like a box of fried chicken parts. Kentucky Fried Chicken’s hooking the hungry up with heart-shaped boxes full of finger-licking goodness. As AdWeek notes, there are three options for poetry, if you can call it that, inside the ‘gram. “Here’s to my friend who loves dark meat and white; The friend who makes a toast before our first bite.” Yeah, this better be a friendship bucket.
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A Kiss For A Free Qdoba Burrito
Show up at Qdoba today and give someone a smooch to get a free burrito. They don’t care who you kiss, either: Your date in line with you, a friend, or your own damn cell phone because those count as partners now.
Pizza Pizza Heart-Shaped Pie
The way to your hungry Valentine's heart ❤️ pic.twitter.com/LhAL42ByhX
— Pizza Pizza (@PizzaPizzaLtd) February 13, 2017
When a pizza delivery guy shows up at someone’s door and there’s foreplay involved, it’s usually a setup to an X-rated plot. The Canadian counterpart to Pizza Hut, Pizza Pizza, is bringing heart-shaped pies to homebody lovers for Valentine’s Day. Forty-seven percent of Canadians celebrating Valentine´s Day “would rather stay in and share a romantic evening at home, while 45 percent prefer going out to enjoy a nice dinner,” according the company’s press release. So let the people have it: Get cheesy.
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Burger King Adults Only
Step aside, Happy Meal: Burger King is tossing sexy playthings into their special-edition Valentine’s meals. The set for a couple comes with two Whoppers, two packs of french fries, two beers, and a “romantic adult toy.” We’re gonna need more than two beers to make this less awkward. Sadly, these are only available in Israel locations, so the rest of us will have to bring our own toys to the drive thru.
McDonald’s Takes Reservations
Don’t let someone else steal your seat at the highly exclusive and typically waitlisted McDonald’s in Canandaigua, New York. Always wanted to take a date to a fancy fundraising dinner? They’re donating half of the proceeds to the Ronald McDonald House. Living the elite philanthropist life.
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Waffle House White Tablecloth Dinners
However you like to get it done—smothered, diced, covered, chunked, peppered, capped, topped or country—Waffle House can hook you up. The tradition continues for their super-festive annual fine-dining experience.