Parade watchers lined up for Jacksonville, North Carolina’s annual holiday parade found themselves watching a horror unfold this weekend: Confident, happy women using their bodies in athletic ways. Also, sparkly leggings.
They represented the students of Studio 360, a fitness studio that offers classes, including aerobics, yoga, and pole dancing.
“As it got closer and I realized what it was and saw a lady performing on a pole in a provocative way, I had to turn the heads of my five-year-old and three-year-old to keep them from seeing it,” a youth pastor told JDNews. “A family oriented parade is not somewhere that parents should have to worry about their children being exposed to what they were doing on that float.” He also said he hopes the Jacksonville-Onslow Chamber of Commerce keeps these abundantly joyous women out of his town’s parades forever. What if his kids have to see women owning their bodies like that again? Horrific.
Another parade watcher told WITN, “I don’t agree with that type of pole dance in a family parade, in a military parade… You know, this is something for our community.”
Pissing people off wasn’t their goal, but it’s a side effect Studio 360 head instructor and manager Brianna Owens says she’s fine with.
Offended townsfolk took their pitchforks to social media, telling the studio how terrible they are for this heinous float and calling the dancers names, including the children in the parade. “We put it out there yesterday. I couldn’t be more proud,” Owens told JDNews. “How they’re handling it now, with horrible comments about them and their children, they’re handling it tremendously.”
Fun fact: Jacksonville also hosts a beauty pageant whose website boldly proclaims in pink, “A Girl should be 2 things…” and you know what, I’m gonna stop ‘em there, because girls should stop listening immediately when they’re told what they should be.
Jennifer Lawrence’s mega stardom revolves around one simple conceit: she’s relatable. She may resemble a bloodthirsty piranha in some of her roles and fight to close the gender wage gap in Hollywood, but she’s also the girl who trips and stumbles at the Oscars. She’s obsessed with Beyonce’s Lemonade just like you. She enjoys guilty pleasures like Real Housewives that would seem *above* a Hollywood star like herself.
All this interesting J.Law catnip comes courtesy of Vanity Fair, who featured the 26-year-old actress as their latest cover star. However, all this pales in comparison to one tidbit slipped into the profile: Lawrence and Emma Stone have a very special friendship. They were introduced by mutual co-star Woody Harrelson and it blossomed from there.
“She texted me that she got my number from Woody,” Lawrence told Vanity Fair. “I replied, Fuck off!’ And we’ve been really good friends ever since.”
Following the introduction the two of them sent messages to each other every day for a year. Said Lawrence: “I feel like it was our version of The Notebook—365 texts.”
This isn’t the only high-profile female friendship Lawrence is in. Her relationship with Amy Schumer has long been documented and celebrated and within the profile, Lawrence dispels any rumors the two aren’t talking anymore.
But as Lawrence is wont to do, she kept it real at an October La La Land screening. When discussing Stone’s performance in the film and their similar competitive position in Hollywood, Lawrence told press, “If I wasn’t her biggest fan, I would’ve Tonya Harding’d her in the kneecaps.”
Stone echoed the sentiment of their friendship: “We both really do love each other and care about each other as people, beyond being actors. I support her completely when it comes to work and I feel the same from her, but I know we’d be friends even if we didn’t do the same job.”
Have you ever felt encumbered by negative energy, depressed or blocked? Do you have behavior patterns you can’t seem to stop.
We all go through experiences in our lives that cause us harm, such as major illness, accidents, trauma or difficult relationships. These experiences can cause heavy deposits in your energy field. Shamanic healing can remove the heavy energy. It can complement other forms of medicine and may succeed where other methods have failed.
Shamanic healing is based on ancient indigenous practices used to treat the spiritual aspects of an illness. It is an earth based medicine. This approach is founded on the belief that our bodies and spirits are composed of various centers of energy, aka ‘chakras. Neuroscience instructs us that when the body’s natural energy flow is blocked it may delay the healing process.
Although I have had an interest in spiritual studies for decades and studied with people like Shakti Gawain, Robert Thurman, Gabrielle Roth, Carolyn Conger, and Mira Devi, I made the decision in 2006 following a battle with breast cancer to switch from a successful career as a lawyer to becoming a shamanic energy healer.
I now practice shamanic healing in Seattle as taught by Alberto Villoldo at the Four Winds Society (called the Harvard of neo-shamanism) after graduating from the Four Winds with a certificate in Light Body Healing. I’ve studied shamanic healing practices extensively at the Sacred Trust in the UK and locally with Betsy Bergstrom who specializes in Curse Unravelling and Depossession.
I offer in person and telephone appointments from my office in Madrona. This past year I have conducted over 300 sessions addressing issues stemming from physical, mental, emotional and spiritual problems.
For patients in medical marijuana states, the paperwork can be an onerous time suck. Sure, you’ll get your medicine, but the lines and multiple forms can make the process unpleasant.
Loudcloud, a California-based tech company, hopes to streamline the system with a new phone app scheduled to launch in January 2017.
The solution is an app that will provide a simple verification process for both dispensaries and patients.
Currently, medical marijuana dispensaries must review patient information documents for every single interaction with a patient. Even longtime patients of a dispensary are required to present proper documentation for the dispensary to review. These interactions can take up to 15 minutes and create lines that discourage new business and turn away patients.
“The whole idea came out of what I thought was an unnecessary burden for dispensary workers … but most importantly the patients,” said Rob Gillett, founder and CEO of LoudCloud said. “We had patients who would lose documents and we’d have to turn them away. Turning away someone not only meant a loss in income but more pain for someone with leukemia or aids.”
With roughly 7 billion dollars in sales annually, the fast-growing cannabis industry will experience an increase in both participation and profits. Medical marijuana makes up a majority of that market share as 29 states currently have programs in place for patients in need of cannabis. Four states — Florida, Arkansas, Montana, and North Dakota — voted for medical marijuana earlier this month.
“With the introduction of medical cannabis into new markets,” the company says, “new dispensaries are set to engage in the heavy cost of a start-up medical business, which includes considerable expenses on employment, technology, and licensure.”
Through a three-step, HIPAA-compliant and confidential process, the app promises to make the purchasing process more efficient. Patients securely upload documents from home onto the LoudCloud server, allowing them to purchase medical marijuana from any of the LoudCloud verified dispensaries provided to them on a map.
For dispensaries, the system allows them to upload new patient information on the LoudCloud server, allowing for new customers to become regular customers without having to haul documentation back to their dispensary. This process also relieves dispensaries of the operation costs of storing information on their own servers.
On some level, we wish to assume the smug media position of being right. This Taylor Swift and Drake friendship/relationship/publicity stunt is real and happening and we tried to warn you.
But a deeper reflection garners a different stance: Warning fine internet folks like yourself about the upcoming doom of a #Draylor takeover is like someone standing in the path of a tornado and thinking, “That might be dangerous.” It is bad and there’s nothing you can do to stop it.
Now we present to you Exhibits A, B, and C.
Yes that is Drake singing Swift’s “Bad Blood” while flexing and lifting weights. He’s so hyped from Tay Tay he drops the bar because the song is “distractingly good.”
It’s a callback to Swift’s similar self-deprecating commercial where she runs on the treadmill while listening to Drake and Future’s “Jumpman.” Then she trips and falls on her face because she’s too focused on rapping along. To be fair, this is understandable: Just try listening to that song and not once whispering “Jumpman, jumpman, jumpman.” It’s impossible.
We joked in an earlier story about calling Drake and Taylor’s totally-not-contrived relationship “Draylor.” We were following the patter of similar silly portmanteaus for celebrities: Brangelina (R.I.P.), KimYe, HiddleSwift (lol), and TomKat.
It was a fun nickname. Then Drake went ahead and actually used it in an Instagram post promoting the ad. Drake is openly trolling the internet and he’s winning. Combined with the natural tour de force that is a Taylor Swift celebrity maelstrom, it’s advised we all clutch each other tightly and wait for this to pass. There’s nothing we can do to stop Draylor.
Some things in life are wonderfully flawed. Coffee is one of them.
In a recent article on Geek Wire, a team of scientists discussed the idea of trying to find “the perfect cup of coffee.” This comes as no surprise. We are a culture berated with choice and the idea of a “perfect cup” of coffee strips down our options, presenting what so many of us desire most: a pre-selected sample of what is considered to be the very best of, well, anything. All of us, in varying degrees, want perfection. We scour the internet for perfect shirts, perfect songs, perfect advice from perfect experts, an unending quest to have in our possession an object — metaphysical or otherwise — that is above reproach from any sector. But, to say that a perfect cup of coffee exists, argues against our subjective desires as humans. It makes the statement that within the wide spectrum of personal palette and experience, there is a singular cup of coffee that could possibly satisfy all of our individual wants and needs. To this, I say, “No, thank you.”
So Many Ways To Screw It Up
The roasting and brewing of coffee in itself is problematic when looking to achieve perfection. Coffee is, or it can be, a delicate, fickle product. It’s altered and changed by the smallest shift in natural occurring phenomenons, like temperature and barometric pressure at both the roasting and brewing stages. A long while ago, I spoke to renowned coffee consultant Ben Kaminsky about a future where a perfect roast profile could be achieved if the coffee was roasted in a sealed laboratory, free from the flavor altering natural elements. It’s certainly a fun visual — roasters in svelte biohazards suits, locked within a sterile white room, poking and prodding at a batch of Brazil’s finest with forceps. And while this might be the future norm, for now we soldier forward, with the natural agents of change buffering us at every corner. As if nature itself was constantly reminding us that perfection is a concept never fully achieved. And let us not forget that each roaster, suited up in clinical garb or not, is a human being, with all our species foibles and beautiful inadequacies, like it or not, transferring into the roasting process. We will never, thank goodness, be perfect, thus, no batch of beans will ever be roasted perfectly.
Human Error Overload
Let’s imagine for a moment though, that yes, in some high-tech facility on a barren stretch of New Jersey turnpike, roasters have achieved a perfect roast profile. How does one then account for the natural imperfection of a barista? Though coffee is often compared to wine in terms of terroir and vintage, there is a striking difference. This being the barista.
While wine sits in a barrel for years before making it to the table and being poured, coffee, regardless of how well it’s roasted, is then placed at the mercy of the barista, all of their coffee context coming to bear. A barista, or better yet a coffee consumer who prepares a morning cup, is a product of years of experience, training, and personal preference.
Once this imaginary perfectly roasted bean ends up in a hopper, all bets are off. This “perfect” bean is now in the hands of a wildcard who, for better or worse, can and will pull a shot or brew a cup with their own personal biases tugging at them the entire way.
Be it tamping method, preferred portafilter, temperature of the water or any other number of options controlled by the barista behind the machine, finding a perfect cup of coffee seems impossible with the preferences of thousands of coffee specialists standing in it’s way. And let’s not forget about the natural elements in any given coffee shop – any open door or a crush of customers raising or lowering the temperature, thus affecting the speed at which the shot of espresso is pulled, for example. Sure, there’s a slim possibility of perfection being achieved in the roasting process, but how does the industry account for human element that invariably exists at the end of any supply chain?
Photo by Caio via Pexels
Beyond any of this though, I firmly believe, that the way we enjoy our coffee needs to be subjective as, again, we are not a perfectly aligned species, always seeking a uniformly perfect flavor profile.
Why search for a perfect cup when a large portion of our coffee society eschews an excellent cup of a light roasted Rwandan in favor of a dark, sludgy cup of Dunkin’ Donuts?
Perfect Imperfection
There’s no reason to believe that somewhere in the middle of speciality coffee and the ubiquitous (insert chain coffee outfit here) there is a cup of joe that will fit the flavor wants of everyone. And as much as the beauty of coffee lies in its malleability — in our ability to shape it’s flavor at the brewing level — this only allows each of us, individually, to craft our own perfect cup of coffee, removed from what other’s have deemed “perfect.” We are humans, we are defined by our ability to choose, and through this choice, we consistently dispel the idea of a perfect anything. Perfection is only in the eye of the beholder, and that eye may be similar, but never the same. Even at the barista level, we have personal preference. We walk into our coffee shops every morning or week and some of us are pleased when one barista is working and some of us are not, because that barista prepares the coffee in their own way, and that way is beloved by some, and not by others.
Coffee is a wild, wonderful product, a simple bean that has innumerable possibilities of flavor, an argument with an endless number of conclusions — all of them right, all of them wrong.
And yes, someday when we live in future houses with our every preference tended to by an army of clear-voiced, smiling artificial intelligence, some version of a perfect cup of coffee may exist. A coffee machine may be invented that is impervious to the whim of nature, to the specific desires of the individual conscious. A robotic barista may stand behind this machine at coffee shops the world over, able to produce, over and over again, whatever the blueprint for “perfect coffee” has been decided, without error and without the concerns of the perfection-smearing traits of their own personal experience. But what then? Do we, the coffee consuming public, forgo our own delight in a cup of shitty diner coffee? Do we bid adieu to a drop of simple syrup at the bottom of a latte? Do we, quite frankly, become a society of coffee drinkers all happily sipping the exact same beverage? I think not. The human enjoyment in pursuit of perfection is an open-ended one, the search so much more enjoyable then the actual result. So, while a new wave of scientists sift through the data to try and discern a cup of coffee that suits the needs of every coffee-drinking human across the globe, the rest of us will continue to find enjoyment in the search for our own perfect cup of coffee. Whatever that might be.
The end of the year, in part, is about looking back and taking a moment to reflect. While the origins of Thanksgiving are mostly tragic and terrible, that doesn’t mean we can’t reflect on both what we are thankful for and what we need to improve on. And, for the sake of this piece, I wanted to take a moment and look back — with a smile — at the beer trends I’m thankful for in 2016.
Fresh hop beers
https://www.instagram.com/p/BKhFjBPAvJC
It’s the saving grace of every September. Farmers and brewers alike have just plucked their hop fields and rushed the oily little green pinecones that are hop flowers to their breweries and, instead of drying them, use them immediately for lighter, brighter — yes, fresh! — IPAs and pale ales. It’s like taking a summer sunset, balling it up in your hand, and juicing it like an orange into a pint glass. Floral, citrusy and exhilarating.
Session IPAs
https://www.instagram.com/p/BM2SSlGAOgk
Similar to their cousin fresh hop, session IPAs are light and bright. But session IPAs often take it one step further. If you like beer, it’s fair to assume you’ve had an IPA or two. And you know how thick and heavy and often malty their bodies can be. But you also know you like their sharpness and edge. Well, with session IPAs you get the floral sharp qualities and a bit of the hops without the big body and heaviness. It’s like a pilsner had a beer child with an IPA. It’s practically the perfect pint.
Hopped reds
https://www.instagram.com/p/BMxYgYBhGiP/
I admit it. I’m a sucker for a red ale. Something about the color and duration the grain is roasted for makes my palate joyous. But I’ll also admit this: often the problem with red ales is they have no backbone and their have a sweet front end. It can be off-putting and deterring. But hopped reds have that important spine, that bite. And the hop either takes the place of or offsets all that malt.
Dark ales
https://www.instagram.com/p/BM6NPMag_lq/
As craft beer becomes more and more ubiquitous, palates (and the eyes with which we first eat and drink) are no longer scared of dark beers. Call it the Guinness effect if you will, but stouts and porters and even Cascadian Dark Ales (I.e. Black IPAs) are becoming more and more available. And, as I wrote recently, now is the perfect time to jump into dark beers like winter warmers and Christmas Ales, those spicy-sweet, perfect-for-a-fireplace-type brew.
Lager-only breweries
https://www.instagram.com/p/BMpsTm0jwjl/
Most of the big domestic beer companies focus on pilsners and lagers. But that’s a business decision and less a love for the style and craft. While they may have perfected a type of lighter beer, they haven’t perfected brewing light beer, in general. But there are breweries who do focus on this primarily and they are yielding excellent, crisp results. To name one, Bellingham, WA’s Chuckanut Brewery makes German-style Helles lagers, Vienna lagers, Czech pilsners and other varieties. They difference between each beer is nuanced and slim but also historic and important to the origins of beer, itself. Czech pilsners use different grains and hops than do Vienna lagers. Want to know more? Chuckanut knows.
Ciders
https://www.instagram.com/p/BGMwp_5kLCi/
Eight words: Goodbye bad ciders and hello mind-blowing new ones! Maybe that was nine words. Either way, we’re full speed ahead on cider production in this country and the dregs of the thick, sugary apple juice-like ciders we were introduced to five or 10 years ago are finally being replaced by deep, nuanced, berry-infused ciders today. Cranberry ciders, ginger ciders, black current and lavender ciders. Yes please!
We all deal with the first real day of winter in different ways. Those of us who dread the shorter days and frigid weather retreat to the indoors. Those of us who look forward to exploring and hiking through snow-covered landscapes can’t wait to unpack their winter jackets and gear, as do those who get excited about the return of their favorite winter sports. And a much, much smaller group of people celebrate the return of the season by stripping down to their underwear, chugging vodka, and then running around freezing, ice-plastered forrest.
For the third year in a row,a middle-aged factory worker from Norway named Tor Eckhoff has filmed himself running through the woods while dressed only in his underwear. The videos show him jumping in and out of snow piles, pausing only to take huge swigs of vodka. In his most recent clip, he saws through a top layer of ice in an outdoor tub with a chainsaw so he can bath in the freezing water.
“I have always had a thing for cold water,” Eckhoff told the Daily Dot, adding that he isn’t paid by the vodka company—or anyone—for his deranged stunts.
So how does he manage to keep his composure during those his frozen forrest romps (not to mention, keep from freezing to death)?
“When you are ice swimming or messing around almost naked in the snow, you have a limited amount of time before you get too cold,” he said. “During that time you just have to handle the cold mentally.”
Over the past couple of weeks, a new meme featuring Kermit the Frog has emerged. The meme, appropriately called Evil Kermit, shows the beloved frog facing a hooded version of himself, with the idea being that the “good” Kermit is losing out to the “bad” Kermit, much like you do when you know the right to do but opt for the wrong choice instead.
Select All reports the photo comes from 2014’s Muppets Most Wanted, in which Kermit confronts his wicked twin Constantine. Somehow, the image made its way onto Twitter, where users were quick to adapt it into a new meme. Below are a handful of the best Evil Kermit tweets.
If this looks familiar, that’s because Evil Kermit is the second popular meme to star the green Muppet. First there was “But that’s none of my business,” which Know Your Meme defines as “a sarcastic expression used as a postscript to an insult or disrespectful remark said towards a specific individual or group.” The meme is most famously associated with a photo of Kermit drinking tea, but other photos of the frog (or Tea Lizard, as some say) also work.
Will Evil Kermit surpass the Mannequin Challenge as 2016’s defining meme? It’s too early to tell but–unless a Beatle partakes–we’re going to guess no.
Friday afternoon, a mysterious white foam rapidly oozed out of an airport hanger onto a Santa Clara, California street, eventually covering a full city block with 3 and a half feet of dense bubbles. While others looked on with wonder or confusion, cyclist Blake Harrington recognized an opportunity.
After learning that the foam was a fire suppressant that could lead only to mild skin irritation, Harrington pedaled directly into the bubbly mass until he was completely submerged. Video from local TV station KTVU shows only the occasional burst of bubbles floating upward to indicate Harrington’s location in the mass.
GIF via KTVU
“Yeah, someone had to do it,” he told KTVU. “We were on the other side and the officers over there were like ‘you should ride through.’ And I was like, ‘OK you guys don’t mind?’ So we decided to do it.”
Despite biking blindly through the mess, which included submerged cars and street curbs, SF Gate reports Harrington escaped relatively unscathed, managing to hit only one sign.
