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Alanis Morissette’s Manager Embezzles For Marijuana

Al Olson
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Alanis Morissette’s Manager Embezzles For Marijuana

What in the heck? Alanis’s Morissette’s manager embezzles for marijuana?  Maybe if he had just asked?

Morissette‘s one-time business manager is headed behind bars after admitting to embezzling nearly $5 million from the singer-singer and investing the money in illegal California marijuana grow operation, according to the U.S. Attorney’s Office.

Morissette shot into stardom in the 1990s with pop hits “Ironic” and “You Oughta Know.”

According to documents filed this week, Jonathan Todd Schwartz, working for GSO Business Management, committed wire fraud and falsified tax returns from 2o1o to 2014.

In addition, Schwartz admitted in a plea agreement to embezzling $4.8 million from Morissette and another $1.7 million from celebrity clients.

Under the plea agreement, Schwartz will serve a four- to six-year prison sentence and must pay $8.2 million in restitution.

The disgraced money manager also copped to falsifying Morissette’s signature to withdraw funds from her bank accounts and lying to his client about how the money was spent, according to the court documents.

“When confronted about the missing funds, defendant falsely stated that the money was an ‘investment’ in illegal marijuana ‘grow’ businesses and that he and other GSO employees, none of whom defendant could identify, had delivered the cash to people, also unidentified, associated with the marijuana businesses,” the plea agreement stated.

In one incident, Schwartz tried to hide his crime by suggesting he’d committed a different one altogether.

“When confronted about the missing funds, defendant falsely stated that the money was an ‘investment’ in illegal marijuana ‘grow’ businesses and that he and other GSO employees, none of whom defendant could identify, had delivered the cash to people, also unidentified, associated with the marijuana businesses,” the plea agreement said.

“Schwartz was caught with his hand in the proverbial cookie jar,” said IRS agent Anthony J. Orlando.

Deirdre Fike, assistant director in charge of the FBI’s Los Angeles office, said “Mr. Schwartz was hired to protect his clients’ money by managing it professionally, but instead misappropriated millions to enrich himself.”

According to GSO, Schwartz no longer works for the agency. “Never in our 38 years has anything like this happened at GSO,” said Chris Reeder, an attorney representing GSO.

More stories

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Time To Feel Old: Sir Mix-a-Lot Talks About The 25th Anniversary of ‘Baby Got Back’

Jacob Uitti
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Time To Feel Old: Sir Mix-a-Lot Talks About The 25th Anniversary of ‘Baby Got Back’

Sir Mix A Lot has made the big booty immortal. When you hear, “Oh my god, look at her…” you know instantly what’s about to happen: someone has a mic by their mouth and they’re about to shout the words, “I LIKE BIG BUTTS AND I CANNOT LIE!” It happens at weddings, karaoke bars, in the club. The song, “Baby Got Back” will live forever.


Sir Mix A Lot – Baby Got Back (1992) by fantomasdj

But what you didn’t know, maybe, is that the song is 25 years old this May.

Twenty. Five.

That’s older than most of you reading this sentence. That’s older than just about everyone taking Intro to Psyche in every college in America. That’s four years older than the legal drinking age. And seven years older than adulthood. 25! And because of this glorious be-cheeked silver anniversary, we wanted to ask Mix a little bit about the song, why he wrote it and what, in his mind, is the jam’s legacy.

Have you thought about the fact that “Baby Got Back” is 25 years old?

It’s interesting; I have thought about it. We’re doing a line of merch – so many people steel lines from “Baby Got Back” and make money off it. It makes me mad sometimes. But we’re going to do some things that are a little different. I also had a dream of doing a re-record of the song but whenever you do that to a song people think is “classic,” it always gets you in trouble with your fans so we decided to leave it alone.

But I do think about it. It’s amazing. That a song like that is still around. I’ve learned lessons from other people who’ve abandoned their big hits. I told myself I’d never do that. The song keeps living!

What’s the song you might write today if you were 25 years younger?

Whatever it is, that song probably wouldn’t get a lot of traction. You have to remember the climate in which I wrote “Baby Got Back.” In 1992 the American standard of beautify was the Spuds MacKenzie girls – popsicle sticks, stop signs – that was American beauty. That’s how it was defined.

But the song bucked the system. It was tongue in cheek. And black women immediately said, “It’s about time!” White women with curves said, “It’s about time!” Everyone. It was almost a movement for a while. Then it became the norm. If I were to write that song now – assuming what happened then would have taken place just the same; women know men love asses now!

Most hits are lucky. I wrote a song that was supposed to be for certain people and it ended up being for everybody.

You have to remember, when you saw African American women on TV other than Clair Huxtable, they were either overweight maids, on syrup bottles or she was a prostitute. That was it. I wanted to write a song. I did it consciously, where I was talking about this woman — I wanted to hit it, but I couldn’t. I wanted to make her that queen.

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One Love: Watch A 5-Year-Old Boy Play With Baby Gorilla At A Zoo

Taylor Berman
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One Love: Watch A 5-Year-Old Boy Play With Baby Gorilla At A Zoo

Earlier this month, a father uploaded a cute video of his five-year-old son playing with a baby gorilla at the Fort Worth Zoo. In the clip, the boy walks and runs back and forth in the gorilla section of the zoo as a baby gorilla appears to occasionally mimic him. The baby gorilla even seems to fall down when the boy does.

“My five-year-old Riley spent an hour or so playing with this 13-month-old gorilla at the Fort Worth Zoo,” the boy’s parents wrote online, according to Newsflare. “The gorilla would copy him and he would do the same. The daddy, Elmo, seemed perturbed by the entire ordeal.”

Watch the full video, via the Daily Mail, below

“Sex Cruise” For Nudists And Swingers Sets Sail In September

TFT Editors
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“Sex Cruise” For Nudists And Swingers Sets Sail In September

If you love cruises but have always hated that there’s not enough open sex stuff on board, we have some great news: The Desire Cruise—described as a couples-only, clothing-optional “high-end, sensual yet spicy experience” — is setting sail this September.

The cruise will begin in the Adriatic Sea and end in Venice, Italy. The “entertainment” on board includes activities and parties like “Sexual Scrabble,” “Sensual Superheroes,” “Naughty Nautical,” and “Golf pros and tennis hoes.”

Screenshot via Desire Cruises

There’s also something called the Signature Playroom. From the cruise’s website as:

You will feel the electrical currents pulsate through your body, as you mix & mingle with like-minded couples in a healthy, sophisticated, erotic playground for adventurers. We invite you to take your relationship to the next level, by living out your forbidden fantasies at sea, in our Signature Playroom.

And a private jacuzzi lounge:

Enter our private, clothing-optional spa deck, with bubbling salt water bath and powerful jets that massage you as you soak up the view in the company of other like-minded couples seeking to fulfill their fantasies. This private, intimate hotspot combines cool sophistication with steamy sensuality.

And, of course, a clothing-optional pool area:

Our clothing-optional pool area provides nothing but hot n´ steamy fun, as the leader in day life aboard “Venice Foreplay”. Desire Cruises continues its infamous reign with an amplified & progressive poolside experience that is all about making waves. So accessorize your sexy self with a carefree attitude, as our Dream Team brings the action to this holiday hotspot.

If you’re busy this fall, we have more good news: The Daily Star reports another sex boat/Desire Cruise is setting sail in April 2018.

Watch This Cat Tell His Owner He Wants A Head Scratch Right “Now”

Taylor Berman
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Watch This Cat Tell His Owner He Wants A Head Scratch Right “Now”

Most people would tell you dogs are smarter than cats. And sure, dogs seem to be capable of more “smart” things than cats, like responding to their name and fetch. But are they better at speaking English? After watching the below video, which shows a cat saying he wants his head scratched right “now,” you are likely to say that cats, or at least this cat, are better at speaking English and perhaps even most languages than dogs are.

“What do we want?” the cat’s owner chants in the brief clip as his orange cat jumps onto a table. “Head scratches! When do we want them?”

“Now,” the cat says.

Amazing.

WATCH: How To Make This Enormous Grilled Cheese Sandwich

Amy Hansen
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WATCH: How To Make This Enormous Grilled Cheese Sandwich

The folks at HellthyJunkFood are at it again. If you’re not familiar with their YouTube channel, you best not be hungry when you watch an episode. The duo recreates giant versions of popular fast-food food: Big Mac, Rolled Chicken Tacos, a single Chicken McNugget. You get the idea.

Recently, they made a ginormous grilled cheese sandwich, with a giant bowl of tomato soup. Comfort food at its finest.

The grilled cheese contains 3,650 calories, 20 slices of cheddar, and two “loaves” of bread. The whole thing takes less than an hour to make from start to finish.

Most importantly, the cheese pull is epic.


9 Art Museums Worth Spending Your Winter Travel Time On

Sam Jones
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9 Art Museums Worth Spending Your Winter Travel Time On

The weather’s getting cold and nasty for most of the country, but that doesn’t mean your options dwindle to ski trips to Netflix binging staycations. Travel to one of these cities with awesome art museums, and spend the day indoors guilt-free. You won’t get a tan, but you might get cultured.

National Museum of Mexican Art (Chicago)

https://www.instagram.com/p/BERWdzSPI7b/

For an art experience you can’t get anywhere else, check out the National Museum of Mexican Art, which features 10,000 works from ancient Mexican artists to modern art.

Cleveland Museum of Art

https://www.instagram.com/p/BPK2mwUgba3/?taken-by=clevelandmuseumofart

Founded in 1913, this museum boasts films, musical events, theater performances, tours and lectures. It also have a rather amusing Ask an Expert section online. Throw your weirdest art-related question at them.

Nelson-Atkins Museum of Art (Kansas City, Missouri)

https://www.instagram.com/p/BPP6h0ugTwG/?taken-by=nelsonatkins

There’s no place like Kansas City, Missouri for unexpectedly awesome art exhibitions. The Nelson-Atkins is currently showing a polyphonic choral music installation, an exhibit covering the last century of surveillance, and much more.

Detroit Institute of Arts

https://www.instagram.com/p/BPSY5w_hfZm/?taken-by=diadetroit

If you find yourself in Detroit on a Friday night, hit up the Institute of Arts’ Friday Night Live, with free live music and art making workshops.

Museum of Fine Arts, Boston

https://www.instagram.com/p/BPae7wYDJN1/

There’s much to see in this art museum, but our recommendation is to get super high and check out Frances Stark’s trippy works, now on display.

Minneapolis Institute of Arts

https://www.instagram.com/p/BPYK5f_BBdQ/?taken-by=artsmia

Plan a visit to Minneapolis for March, when this institute will show a Guillermo del Toro exhibition that’s as freaky as it is film-geeky.

Houston Museum of Fine Arts

https://www.instagram.com/p/BPc621jlpcE/

There are things to do in the Texan art scene other than South By Southwest. In Houston, catch a film or sketch in the garden.

Wadsworth Atheneum Museum of Art (Hartford, Connecticut)

https://www.instagram.com/p/BO9z32chE-q/

Art talks, American independence exhibits, and Utamaro — What more could you want?

Virginia Museum of Fine Arts (Richmond, Virginia)

https://www.instagram.com/p/BPIOfzchki1/

If you’re life’s felt like “The Scream” lately, the VMFA has the exhibit for you: Edvard Munch and Jasper Johns are on display through February.

This Insane Young Thug Video Is Going Viral For The Best Reason

Sam Jones
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This Insane Young Thug Video Is Going Viral For The Best Reason

Young Thug just released an amazing, hilarious new video for his song “Wyclef Jean.” The music video’s a hit, but there was just one minor problem with filming: Young Thug didn’t show up. It cost $100,000 to make, and the rapper never made it to the shoot.

Ryan Staake “co-directed” (quotations theirs) this video with Young Thug. The rap artist, infamous for not taking direction well, sent Staake a recording of him explaining the video concept to his team.

His instructions included “kiddie cars,” but not go carts, “like the power wheels joints.” He also wanted a “lot of bitches, bad bitches,” riding in the cars along with him.

Related Article: How Vine Shaped Music And Made These Songs Blow Up

The only time we see Thugger on screen is in his own footage, which he sent Staake footage he use in the video. In his home-shot video, he’s throwing Cheerios in his face. For some reason.

All of this didn’t stop Staake from creating a documentary-style video detailing his experience trying to wrangle a cohesive video out of a series of hysterical events.

Children and scantily-clad women destroy a police car with rubber and wooden bats. Thugger eventually does make it to the set, but apparently refused to get out of the car because he’d just found out his Instagram was hacked.

Related Article: “Lady Gaga Sounds Lost, But Young Thug And Sia Soar”

Ryan Staake said in an interview with Complex that all of this might sound unbelievable, but the tale seems to be true.

“The truth is stranger than fiction in this case, and I just wanted to run with it. So then I pushed back and said that I needed creative freedom because it needed to be in my voice. I don’t want people putting words in my mouth, I want to do it the way I want to do it for it to make sense and be funny. And for it to be, honestly, something worthwhile. I wasn’t interested in doing it if a marketing person was putting their words in my mouth.”

In another interview with TV Booooooom, Staake keeps his stories straight:

“The only part of this that was planned was using the audio of him describing what he wanted and building it out piece by piece. Beyond that, its 100% a reaction to the shitty cards I was dealt on this production. The video tells the story of what actually happened, but I agree, that would’ve been quite a concept if I’d planned it all.”

Related Article: The Winners And Losers Of MTV’s 2016 VMAs

Staake goes on to say he’s not even sure Young Thug has seen the video, or if he likes it. But considering the video has gotten nearly 700,000 views after being online for one day, it’s safe to say it’s a success.

Inside Colorado’s New Campaign For Safe Marijuana Use

Al Olson
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Inside Colorado’s New Campaign For Safe Marijuana Use

Please consume responsibly.

That is the focus of a public service announcement campaign for 2017 created by the Marijuana Industry Group.

The marketing outreach — especially geared toward teens — advocates safe and responsible consumption in Colorado, the state that first allowed for recreational marijuana sales.

“By design, this campaign is stark and serious, because public safety is serious. Government agencies shouldn’t be alone in encouraging good decision-making,” said Kristi Kelly, director of MIG, a cannabis trade association. “It’s important that people know that the industry also cares about our communities,” she said.

The campaign was announced last month and Coloradans will soon see various messages across the state. The ads, which will appear in print-and online publications, will focus on three primary messages:

  • Encourage safe dosing.
  • Avoiding driving after consumption.
  • Keeping cannabis product locked away from curious kids.

MIG has long been engaged in discussions regarding safe consumption, and has a seat on the Colorado Task Force for Drunk and Impaired Driving. The organization has also participated in providing feedback to the Colorado Department of Transportation’s “Drive High Get a DUI” campaigns and Colorado Department of Health and Environment’s “Good to Know” campaigns.

Remember: Please consume responsibly.

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Georgia Man Uses $3 Million Lotto Winnings to Invest in Meth Ring

Taylor Berman
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Georgia Man Uses $3 Million Lotto Winnings to Invest in Meth Ring

Every good financial advisor will tell you to make your money go to work for you. Why leave it in a savings account or under your mattress when you could invest it in a mutual fund, stocks, or, as one Georgia man recently did, a local meth ring?

In February 2015, Ronnie Music Jr. 45, won $3 million off a scratch-off ticket in his hometown of Waycross, Ga. Instead of investing that money in something safe—and legal—like an S&P 500 stock market index fund, which the New York Times notes would’ve netted him about $170,000 in returns, Music put the money into a meth ring, which was busted just nine months later. From the Atlanta Journal-Constitution:

In September 2015, his accomplices were caught trying to sell about 11 pounds of crystal meth worth more than $500,000, prosecutors said. Music was identified as a source for the drug.

Agents seized more than $1 million worth of meth, firearms, thousands of rounds of ammunition, multiple vehicles and more than $600,000 in cash as part of the case, prosecutors said.

Last week, Music, a convicted felon, pleaded guilty to charges of federal drug trafficking and firearm charges, and could be sentenced to life in prison.

Photo courtesy of Georgia Lottery

“Music decided to test his luck by sinking millions of dollars of lottery winnings into the purchase and sale of crystal meth,” United States Attorney Ed Tarver said in a statement. “As a result of his unsound investment strategy, Music now faces decades in a federal prison.”

The lesson? Meth rings may seem like a solid, recession-proof industry, but you probably shouldn’t invest in them.

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