Who doesn’t want to feel like they’re part of a secret club? While joining the Friars is probably not your bag, there’s a far tastier way to feel special. Read on to discover your new favorite fast foods–no weird, secret handshake required!
Dairy Queen – Frozen Hot Chocolate Reminiscent of a Frappuccino, this frosty hot chocolate drink could potentially send you on a treasure hunt, as most DQ chains only offer it as a seasonal option. Some outlets, however, will be happy to make it for you year-round if you ask. Serendipity at its finest.
Chick-Fil-A – Blueberry Cheesecake Milkshake Apparently, all you have to do is ask your very patient server, who hopefully had their coffee this morning, to blend a slice of blueberry cheesecake into your vanilla milkshake and voila! Your daily fruit quota has never tasted so good.
Sonic – Pickle-O’s These “discontinued” deep-fried pickle slices are no longer listed, but their memory lives on in the form of a secret menu item. They’re most popular in the southern states, but since pickles and fry batter are always on hand at Sonic, it’s really no problem to accommodate the request anywhere. Go ‘head and ask.
Shake Shack – Beer Float This adult version of the root beer float resides in Las Vegas, for when your sweet tooth has the nerve to interrupt your buzz. It’s a scoop of vanilla custard in the beer of your choice. Delicious? Maybe. Necessary? Absolutely.
Taco Bell – The Incredible Hulk Not to be confused with The Hulk, a bean and cheese burrito loaded with guacamole, this overloaded sibling is a five-layer burrito made with guac instead of the standard nacho cheese sauce. All the green monster with none of the radiation.
Red Robin – Cure Burger Initially introduced as a New Year’s Day hangover cure in 2015, this burger — a beef patty topped with bacon, cheese, chili, mushrooms and a sunny-side up egg on a sesame bun — became the chain’s first secret menu item. Death: The ultimate hangover cure.
Look, no one’s denying the premise isn’t silly: Take a super conservative and convoluted world leader and make him young, in all the subversive, bloated meaning of that word. And no one’s denying you must buy it: Establishing a show with an opening shot of a pile of babies—questionably dead or alive—regardless of what’s really going on, sort of demands viewers either accept this unreliable, madhouse world immediately or not. And no one’s even saying this makes any sense: How did Patrick Bateman become the Pope? Would the Catholic Church leaders really give up this power so freely? Did he have to be American?
But all those delirious, demented circumstances is what made any of us curious in the first place. Because in this content overload environment we’re all trapped in, anything approaching normal is just plain boring. It’s not enough. Any of it, but especially a basic power struggle drama where an antihero character unqualified and undeserving sits on the throne. Correction: In these times, that might’ve been too much.
So the Pope’s young, what does that mean? What kind of youthful stereotype are they twisting? Is it generational? What type of ramifications will being young—hip young, plays-it-loose young, temperamental young, silly young, YUNG young—bear on the Papal Palace?
All important questions. Thankfully for you, we have answers. (Quick warning: If it wasn’t obvious, this post will be spoilers heavy.)
Baby Talk
What happened: Lenny Belardo climbed out of, or possibly through, or maybe dove headfirst and swam a few laps in a pile of babies. Some were kicking and some were Casper. Regardless, the Young Pope emerged from this toddler town.
What does this mean: The Young Pope misdirects with its opening shot, kind of going dream-within-a-dream sequence on us. But within this show—three words: Cherry Coke Zero (we’ll get to it)—anything truly is possible. Maybe Belardo read Jonathan Swift’s A Modest Proposal and thought, “Your mans was up to something,” and tried it out. Who knows?
Young Rating: Babies. Birth. Belardo. Can’t get more Young than those three right there.
That Speech
What happened: In a dream, Lenny Belardo envisions delivering a speech that promotes gay marriage, body acceptance, and sexual desires. Archbishops faint, the church loses its mind, young kids in the crowd cheer.
What does this mean: Being the Catholic Church and all, we’re going with repressed sexual desires. But also, a show farcically replacing the Pope with Young Guy, this would be all the joking predictions a viewer could make. Nothing’s more stereotypically young like hip, cool, and above all, sexy.
Young Rating: Millennial blogger. Someone who submitted personal diary entries to Thought Catalog or Elite Daily and demands no one questions their sexual anything.
What happened: Presented with an immaculate breakfast buffet, the Pope asserts he only drinks a Cherry Coke Zero for breakfast. A butler offers him a Diet Coke as temporary solution, and the young Pope responds, “It is death to settle for things in life.”
What this means: Dickie Greenleaf gets what he wants. But we should’ve known that already.
Young Rating: Cherry Coke Zero is youthful perfection repackaged for a millennial audience. I was discussing Lenny’s choice, though the description fits both. Judging by Lenny’s age, it’s actually a kind of hip Gen Xer who knows the lingo and keeps up with the pop culture trying to show off to a younger crowd he still gets it.
Smoking
What happened: Lenny Belardo smoked in the Papal Palace. When confronted that smoking is prohibited, the Young Pope asked who created such rules. “John Paul II,” is the reply, which Lenny points out, was the Pope, which is what he is now. As is the case, he makes the rules now.
What this means: As the act of smoking always is, a power move by giving the finger to death.
Young Rating: Gen X, Gen X, Gen X. Moving on.
Not Believing In God
What happened: The Young Pope confesses to Tomasso near episode’s end and declares, “God does not exist.” When this sends poor, gentle Tomasso into hysteria, a quick retraction of “just kidding” is uttered. The look on Lenny’s face tells otherwise.
What this means: This could be the whole dilemma of The Young Pope, exploring the absurdism of faith, and the absurdism of not believing in anything.
Young Rating: Lack of faith, leaning into atheism but not embracing it, serious abandonment issues, never fulling revealing his true position on an issue? No question. Total sucker for a millennial.
Forget y’alls wine and cheese pairings. The first ever wine and weed symposium is coming to Sonoma this summer.
Okay, so it won’t exactly be a party with everyone getting high on glasses of Chardonnay and pot brownies, but it is definitely a move that will benefit both wine and cannabis producers.
The Wine Industry Network had the bright idea to bring the two industries together, realizing they have a lot in common — both are agriculture-based, heavily regulated and produce a buzz — and should probably figure out a way to work together.
“The wine industry is obviously more celebrated and socially acceptable. But the cannabis market — especially in California — is ready to explode,” says Al Olson, cannabis editor at The Fresh Toast and former wine editor for the San Jose Mercury News.
Instead of fighting for market share, there is great opportunity for the two sectors to collaborate.
“The mature wine industry will be able to reach a broader, younger audience by working in concert with marijuana outfits. The nascent cannabis industry benefits by introducing its product to a sophisticated consumer base.”
The conference will be held August 3 in Santa Rosa, CA and, according to WIN’s press release, will focus on the legalization of cannabis in California and the expected impact and opportunities that this presents to the wine industry.
Topics will include: the newly implemented law, along with experts from both the wine and cannabis industries on regulations, licensing requirements, hospitality, tourism, farming, and other topics of interest.
How epic was 2016 for cannabis? Well, when the number of legal states with marijuana access double in a year, you can consider that a groundbreaking year. Add in another four states with medical marijuana programs, and you start to see a trend that will be tough to reverse — no matter who is the attorney general.
As the nation prepares for a new administration, Canna Law Blog, an influential platform run by a team of 1o cannabis attorneys. posted a ranking of states based on how they treat cannabis and citizens who consume it.
Oregon became a legalized marijuana state in 2014 when voters overwhelmingly supported Measure 91. According to Canna Law Group. it has already surpassed Colorado (No. 2) and Washington (No. 3), the first two states to legalize recreational adult use.
Daniel Shortt, author of the list, explains Oregon’s top ranking:
Determining the top state in this series was not easy. There was significant debate among our cannabis lawyers as to whether California, Colorado, Oregon, or Washington should take top honors. … One of the prime determinants for us was Oregon not having a residency requirement, as we see this as very business friendly and making it much easier for cannabis businesses to secure funding.
Colorado earned its second-place ranking partly based on its influence nationally, according to Shortt:
One could argue that Colorado’s successful legalization has done more for legalization nationwide than that of any other state. One could also make a good argument for Colorado having done more to end the stigma surrounding cannabis than another state.
South Dakota is considered the least cannabis-friendly state. Why? Shortt explains:
Cannabis is totally illegal in South Dakota. It is not available for either recreational or medical use and it has not been decriminalized. And South Dakota has some of the strictest penalties for cannabis possession in the country.
The maximum penalty for selling more than a pound of weed is 25 years in the state penitentiary. Even being caught in possession of a bong or any cannabis paraphernalia can lead to a 30-day stint in prison and a fine of $500.
Every preceding generation of humanity loudly proclaims their successors will make society stupider, more selfish, and slip farther away from our core morality. If you don’t at least suspect this, you’re probably a millennial.
But a new report indicates that attitude from ancestors could hold some validity. The Reykjavik genetics firm deCODE found genes linked to people spending more years in education had decreased in Iceland from 1910 to 1975.
Pinpointing gene variants predisposed to educational attainment, scientists examined a database of more than 100,000 Icelanders and discovered a small decline over time. This could indicate natural selection to steer away from organized learning. Perhaps more startling was the effect these genes had on procreation.
Those who carried more “education genes” tended to have fewer children than others. This led the scientists to propose that the genes had become rarer in the population because, for all their qualifications, better educated people had contributed less than others to the Icelandic gene pool.
This report goes in hand with a recent Harvard study by Jonathan Beauchamp who found evidence that humans are still evolving by focusing on the lifetime reproductive success (rLRS) of a small portion of the U.S. populace. (For the record: The scientific community debates whether humans have or have not stopped evolving yet.) Beauchamp reported that natural selection was working very softly against educational attainment.
After studying the data, Beauchamp found evidence of evolution in two phenotypes—a slight uptick in the age of first menstruation and a trend toward a lower rLRS for people who had more education—conversely, people with less education had more kids and thus more opportunity to pass on their genes.
Beauchamp did, however, acknowledge the limitations of his small data set and that using this data to indicate future trends could be problematic. The rates of technological advancement, along with various other social progression, could have profound effects.
Natural selection opting away from educational attainment remains a recent development. Kari Stefansson, who led the Icelandic study, warned that if the trend continued for centuries, it could lead to serious implications.
As he told The Guardian: “The cumulative effect over time means this is going to have a dramatic effect on the genetic predisposition to educational attainment, and unless something comes along to counteract that, it could have a profound effect on educational attainment in our society.”
Have you nixed gluten from your diet? Or maybe you just love experimenting with new ingredients and techniques? Banana bread is a basic thing to master when you’re trying to bake, but this one is a huge, boldly flavored hit wherever you deploy it, even sans gluten.
One of the hottest bakers on the planet right now, Christina Tosi, gave out the best banana bread advice I have ever heard: Let the bananas get downright-appallingly-rotten. This doesn’t generally happen with an entire bunch at once, but if you keep a Ziploc in the freezer, you can put the brown (almost black!) bananas in two or one at a time.
Once you have about four, it’s banana bread time. These grotesque, slimy, brown creatures will emit the strongest banana flavor under the sun; strong enough to even mask (and accent!) the flavor of weed. You can add any nuts and spices you like to the mix. Mine is a mashup of traditional and tropical.
Preheat oven to 325 degrees. Mix together all dry ingredients. In a separate bowl, mash bananas, coconut oil, vanilla, and molasses together until well combined. Add eggs and whisk until it comes together. Fold banana mixture into dry ingredients. Fold in most of nuts and coconut chips.
Pour into parchment lined and greased bread pan, sprinkle remaining coconut and walnut on top
Bake at 325 for 45 minutes, rotating halfway through if your oven is not consistent, you may also have to cover with foil if coconut and walnut starts getting too brown.
Let cool overnight before attempting to slice, gluten free breads don’t have the elasticity of regular wheat flour breads, so you will end up with a crumbled mess if you even try. The good news is, if that happens, you can make bread pudding with it!
Put ¼ cup coconut oil in a clean mason jar with your starting material. Seal the Mason jar and placed in a warm water bath for 1 hour. Cool the Mason jar to room temperature and place in a freezer overnight. The next day, defrost and place in a water bath once more, just to heat through. Strain if using raw cannabis. If using a concentrate or hash you won’t have to strain.
A perfect banana bread is not an expert affair, it’s quite easy to put together. When you start to experiment with flavors, the pungent banana flavor will still shine through. This goes so well with weed flavor wise, and is pretty strong if you make the one ounce of bud/one pound of oil ratio, using roughly 1 stick per batch of goodies has the strength of a quarter ounce, and then each slice….is strong. Make sure to label this one if you don’t want any ‘household accidents’ in which someone who doesn’t intend to get high wolfs half the loaf, as this has happened in mine.
The recipe for Krabby Patties is safe for another day: A restaurant was denied the chance to call themselves the “Krusty Krab” when a federal court ruling decided a name doesn’t have to be trademarked to be considered protected by trademark laws.
The restaurant from the much-loved television show is famous for its patties, grumpy cashier, and the overly-zealous SpongeBob Squarepants on the grill.
As Consumerist points out, the complaint from Viacom, SpongeBob’s parent company, contains some of the most ridiculously delightful, dare we say prose, to grace a formal letter:
“The ‘Krusty Krab’ is owned by Eugene H. Krabs, a prominent and recurring character in the SpongeBob universe. SpongeBob SquarePants works at the ‘Krusty Krab’ as a fry cook, but he also performs a myriad of other duties, and once stated that his official title is ‘Vice Assistant General Manager in charge of certain things.’ The ‘Krusty Krab’ is the scene of many comical exchanges between SpongeBob and his co-worker, Squidward Tentacles. SpongeBob loves his job and considers Squidward a close friend; Squidward hates his job and does not like SpongeBob.
“‘Krusty Krab’’s chief competitor is the ‘Chum Bucket,’ which is owned by Sheldon J. Plankton, Mr. Krabs’ worst enemy. The ‘Krusty Krab’ maintains an advantage over the “Chum Bucket” based upon the popularity of its ‘Krabby Patty’ burger.”
A U.S. District Court judge decided that “ownership of a mark is established by use in the market, not by registration.” Since Spongebob is a highly valuable holding for Viacom, and the Krusty Krab name is so distinctively associated with Spongebob, its use merited trademark protection.
The company trying to use the name, IJR Capital Investments, told the Wall Street Journal that they believed the decision was handed down from a biased judge. Don’t be a Squidward, guys. There are other pineapples in the sea.
Starbucks has released its first new coffee drink of 2017: the Cascara latte. It’s made from the dried fruit of the coffee cherry, which gives the drink a subtle sweet flavor without adding gobs of syrup. And while we’ll look the other way when someone mentions that “cascara” shares the same name as a sacred bark used for its potent laxative effect, we can’t look away at the duds Starbucks has trotted out over the years. RIP “Evening Program,” we barely knew ya. Here now, a ranking of the company’s efforts, from bad to baller. Or, with our majorly unscientific ranking system we’ll call the Flop-O-Meter, 1 equals a Frothy Flop, while 10 is a Hot Hit.
Oh, you don’t remember that time Starbucks tried to be a restaurant? Circadia came about after the, uh hem, coffee experts purchased Circadia Flatbread Oven in 1997. The restaurant version was tested in Seattle and San Francisco, boasting breakfast, lunch, dinner, cocktails…and laptop rentals? The concept never really took off (and because it was pre-social media, there’s nary a photo to be found) and both restaurants eventually turned into full-fledged Starbucks. Flop-O-Meter: 1
What do you mean coffee and cola don’t taste good together? This Pepsi collaboration in 1994 tanked almost immediately. Flop-O-Meter: 1
Sorbetto
Do you eat it or drink it? That could be why Sorbetto never really took off after it was tested in Seattle and California markets in 2008. The failure of this second-rate fruity Frappuccino could also be blamed on the faltering economy and/or the 45 minutes it took baristas to clean the Sorbetto machine every day. Flop-O-Meter: 1
Who goes to Starbucks to buy a $100 blender? Nobody, which is why the product sells on eBay these days. The recipe books which accompanied each blender were filled with, you guessed it, Starbucks coffee recipes, like smoothies and milkshakes, made with Starbucks ice cream, of course. Flop-O-Meter: 3
Perhaps because nobody could pronounce it (SHAN-tih-koh), the drinking chocolate that debuted in 2005 never found its footing and was considered a total flop by 2006. Or, you know what? Maybe it failed because the petite 6-ounce drink contained a whopping 400 calories and 20 grams of fat. Nah, it’s probably the pronunciation. Flop-O-Meter: 4
Nobody needs the Slurpee equivalent of iced coffee. Nobody. But yet, here we are. Flop-O-Meter: 5
Evolution Fresh
Photo courtesy of Starbucks
While not technically a Starbucks product, the coffee titan acquired the California company in 2011 and now there seems to be Evolution Fresh cold-pressed juices everywhere! Other than water, it’s probably the healthiest drink Starbucks sells. Flop-O-Meter: 6
Instant coffee that’s portable and not freeze dried? What took you so long, Starbucks? VIA launched around 2009 and quickly became a big hit with coffee drinkers embarrassed to admit they keep Foldgers in their home “for emergencies.” VIA packets are about a buck each, but Starbucks customers learned long ago to keep their cost expectations in check. Flop-O-Meter: 7
Starbucks purchased the Portland, Oregon company from teamaker Steven Smith (co-founder of Stash Tea) in 1999. The first Tazo store opened in Seattle in 2012, eventually transitioning into the Teavana store that stands today. Starbucks still sells Tazo products in grocery stores and big box retailers, such as Target. Flop-O-Meter: 8
In 2012, Starbucks replaced Tazo with this Atlanta-based tea retailer. Now, there are more than 300 retail outlets and even Oprah has given her endorsement with Teavana’s Oprah Chai Tea. It’s pretty much downhill from here. Flop-O-Meter: 8
Flat White
Photo courtesy of Starbucks
Popular in Australia, this drink is really what great baristas have always made: two shots of espresso with a free pour of velvety steamed whole milk. It’s this steaming method that makes latte art possible. Still unclear why Starbucks doesn’t make all its drinks this way. Flop-O-Meter: 8
Iced Coffee — Brewed to Personalize
Photo courtesy of Starbucks
Starbucks really hit a home run with their bottled iced coffee, which can easily be found at most major grocery stores. It’s the perfect item to stock in your fridge when you need coffee RIGHT NOW! Flop-O-Meter: 9
You can’t not order this while standing in line for coffee. Flop-O-Meter: 10
Nitro Cold Brew
https://www.instagram.com/p/BM_BbIYhOLf
Introduced in the summer of 2016, this was a no-brainer for Starbucks, which has a knack for latching onto national coffee trends. If you aren’t familiar with nitrogen-infused cold brew, just think of your favorite stout — how rich and creamy it is straight from the tap. A total win for Starbucks. Flop-O-Meter: 10
Starbucks bought the niche Clover Brewing System in 2008, making it possible to brew a single cup of single origin coffee for the masses. A very smart purchase for a company that strives to be relevant. Flop-O-Meter: 10
Pumpkin Spice Latte
Photo courtesy of Starbucks
People flip out over this drink every season. The PSL debuted in 2003, forever creating a punchline for white girls and yoga pants. Flop-O-Meter: 10
Frappuccino
Photo courtesy of Starbucks
Do we even remember a time before these delicious blended drinks were introduced in 1995? Interesting fact: it wasn’t Starbucks that came up with the name Frappuccino. It was adapted from a cold, slushy drink made via soft-serve machine at Boston’s Coffee Connection, which Starbucks purchased in 1994. Flop-O-Meter: 10
Both Fizzio (handcrafted soda) and Refreshers (fruit juice and green tea extract) seem to be falling off menu boards across the country. While Fizzio struggles to maintain its holding, Refreshers are seeing greater strength as canned versions in many grocery and Starbucks stores.
Latte Macchiato
Photo courtesy of Starbucks
This newish drink that is a latte and macchiato hybrid has people more confused than the Flat White. Is it a latte or a macchiato, Starbucks? It can’t be both!
Translation: bars. Back in 2010, someone at Starbucks had the brilliant idea to start serving alcohol and cheese plates in some of their stores. Since Starbucks Lounge sounds like a place to catch a Night Ranger show at your local casino, they refer to this new lineup as part of their “evening program.” But, alas, the Evening Program has met its demise. The company is ending the booze-fest, already halting service at more than 400 of it’s stores.
What was ignited by a golf putt has now ignited a social media frenzy; a British pool stunt being called the “best trick shot ever.”
In the video, which has already garnered more than 1.5 million views on Facebook, you can see the ball go through a series of elaborate obstacles, including sailing across 9 pool tables at AllStars Sports Bar in Bristol.
Owner and former pool player Shane O’Hara tells The Bristol Post that he started the trick shot at 11 pm and finished it right before 8am the next morning. The 31-year-old says he used three GoPro batteries in the process.
“I set the whole thing up backwards, starting with where the ball ends and working my way back. It must have taken at least 150 recordings before it finally went in.”
As amazed as I was that it finally went in, I was glad just to be able to go bed to be honest!
Many Facebook commenters are quick to label the video “fake,” pointing out that it’d be impossible for a ball to roll uphill, which it appears to be doing at the end, but AllStars assures that it’s indeed real. See for yourself:
Inauguration Day is sneaking up on us and we can’t think of a better time to introduce a new drinking game. With Friday the 13th already out of the way (if you are reading this, it means you survived, so congrats on that) this handy-dandy new game (and suggested beers to match), will help you survive Friday the 20th. Good luck!
Ingredients:
Rolling Rock Tall Cans (12)
Sierra Nevada Pale Ale (12)
Newcastle Brown Ale (6)
Stella (6)
Your favorite local beer (6)
Solo Cups (12)
Deck of cards (1)
Dice (2)
Rules:
Step 1:
The day starts early – 6am for you west coasters – that’s practically Macy’s Day Parade territory. But fear not, we’ll have you tipsy, happy and resting peacefully before the day is done. Here’s what to do:
Sleep as late as you can, eat a big breakfast and relax your mind. It’s going to be a long day and (potentially) a long four years. Don’t blow a fuse today. Call a friend over, maybe a couple, and play cards. Something simple (maybe gin rummy, but definitely not WAR!) and talk about your hopes and dreams and fears. Get it out there.
Step 2:
Okay, it’s the afternoon now. Time to get to it. Put on your favorite news channel and take in the scene. Assign 1 drink (maybe a sip of beer) for:
Images of limos
American flags
Foreign flags
Waving and smiling politicians
Mentions of Hilary Clinton
References to Obama’s post-presidential career
This will bring some levity to the room. Inevitably someone will shout and point, “Oh they talked about Obama hosting a podcast! Oh, they just said Barak is going to be the new NFL Commissioner. Drink!”
Refine your assignments right before the swearing in. Choose three terms to pay attention for, like:
Donald Trump’s hair waving in the wind
Mike Pence squinting in the D.C. sun
A Rockette pulling a Kaepernick
And every time one occurs, take your dice and roll (either 1 or both, depending on the number of people in the room) and the number that comes up is the number of drinks you get to pass around to your friends. But be careful, if you pick on someone, they’ll likely get you back (it’s the old drinking game rule: a die for a die).
Step 4:
But what are the Solo cups for? Good question! It’s Flip Cup time!
Nothing gets a room moving like a rousing game of F.C. It’s just about the simplest game you can play, which is good because by now you’re somewhere between buzzed and hammered. So split off into teams and find the edge of a table and set those cups on it. It’s this sort of fun, goofy entertainment that will keep people together during a changing political era, no matter your politics.
