Saturday, December 13, 2025
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How J.J. Abrams Swaps Stories For Feelings

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“Maybe there are times when mystery is more important than knowledge,” so said J.J. Abrams during his 2007 TED Talk. It was a speech that revealed a great deal about Abrams, perhaps, if only, in retrospect. The topic of his talk was “The Mystery Box.” The guy who helped created Lost and Alias? The very same dude who directed the titillating Mission Impossible III? What could he reveal about storytelling and filmmaking? It was, almost, too much to bear.

Abrams started with a joke. He wanted to discuss the structure of polypeptides and played an earnest man. He was serious. Then the crowd laughed, a chorus of chuckles you could mistake for a How I Met Your Mother-quality laugh track. Abrams moved on. He knew what the audience was there for and so did the audience. He didn’t need to explain it. You got the joke.

I get a lot of people asking me, ‘What the hell’s that island?’

“I get a lot of people in terms of Lost, asking me, ‘What the hell’s that island?’” he said. Remember this was 2007. “It’s usually followed by, ‘No, seriously: What the hell’s that island?’”

Crowd produces another laugh track. Abrams moves on again. Next beat.

He’s an artist who works from desired effect backward. Abrams isn’t like Steven Spielberg, who receives a (mostly) unfair criticism as a pleaser, or George Lucas, whose perfectionist tendencies, and detailed world-building includes your interpretations of his world.

Abrams instead would like the attention of the class. He’s a showman on a stage, but that stage happens to be the audience’s immediate reactions. He wants your curiosity. He wants your intensity. He wants your wonder. He is very adept at capturing all those reactions because of his approach to storytelling. As he revealed in that TED Talk, “What are stories but mystery boxes?”

And when Abrams makes comments of that nature, all your questions that his work consistently generates, all that feeling of Needing to Know What It Means, collapses into just one query. Does Abrams even know what a story is?

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Have you watched a J.J. Abrams movie lately? Watched is the wrong term. Have you re-watched a J.J. Abrams movie lately? The only one I can re-watch is Mission Impossible III and even then, if I forget to stop the film in its third act, I’m downright despondent at the end. The possible joy of watching that movie has little to do with its director, J.J. Abrams. It’s about the actors: Philip Seymour Hoffman as the villain and Tom Cruise, the hero.

Goodness, the way that film opens, Cruise strapped powerless to a chair, looking like a deranged, caged hedgehog, as Hoffman callously rips his heart out, then takes a bite before tossing it aside, the taste not up to standard. Hoffman persists as the best villain the Mission Impossible franchise because he so thoroughly undermines every “heroic” expectation we have of not only Cruise’s character Ethan Hunt, but Cruise himself. Hoffman’s character challenges Cruise’s, defeating him at every turn, because they’re playing different games; Cruise is in a game of chess while Hoffman plays fuck you. It’s the last time Cruise acted in a film with another Great Actor; probably because Hoffman worked him so.

A movie that finesses some complex subversion turns into disappointingly thin, weak sauce when Cruise needs to win, to be the hero. Nothing’s wrong with that happening. I mean, he is the hero. A similar plot envelops The Dark Knight, a classic. The Joker exploits every single flaw Batman has, jackhammering insanity into his cowl, until Batman’s forced to change. He becomes a better, deeper hero because of The Joker, accepting himself as The Dark Knight.

Cruise sort of just ‘wakes up,’ as if he were an amnesiac who suddenly remembers he can win, so he does.

That’s not what happens here. Cruise sort of just “wakes up,” as if he were an amnesiac who suddenly remembers he can win, so he does. Nothing really changes. And it’s like Hoffman forgets all of Cruise’s weaknesses, and starts playing chess with Cruise, a Grandmaster. The characters that started the film are not the same ones who end it, but there’s no reason, no explanation why.

Here’s the thing: This happens all the time in J.J. Abrams movies. No through-line ever exists for his characters. He wants them to experience pain, so they do, then just move on, like it never happened. No emotional resonance, no evolution of the character.

Think of Star Wars: The Force Awakens, a movie I’ve refused to re-watch because I know it will disappoint me. The Big Scene, The Big Moment the movie builds to, that it knows you want, is the confrontation between Han Solo and Kylo Ren. A father and son with a shattered relationship. Han trying to reach out, mend his mistakes, because the weight of the galaxy is at stake, but also because a dad loves his son. But Kylo kills him. I don’t know if you got that: a son murders his father, Han freakin’ Solo, one of the most beloved characters in all of film, and do you remember how you felt?

It was something like sadness, but not really sadness. It’s like having average sex with someone you don’t love; you know it’s supposed to make you happy, so you convince yourself it does, but your heart never buys it. Maybe in the moment your faking it works, but later on, you realize how hollow that emotion was. And that’s how it always feels watching a J.J. Abrams movies and why they’re so atrocious to re-watch: His movies are good-enough one-night stands. Sometimes they’re a little better than good. But everyone who ever has knows the truth about a one-night stand: You never go back. There’s nothing really there. There never was in the first place. It’s usually better to pretend otherwise.

***

News broke recently that Meryl Streep was starring in a show called The Nix. Huge news. The upper echelon of the highest tier of acting talent in the world, one of our biggest and best movie stars was headded to television. What does this mean for movies? If Streep would do TV, does that mean TV had finally won?

I’m not really interested in answering that question. Nor am I interested in qualifying if movies are dead (for the thousandth time). My main concern is simple: I’m worried J.J. Abrams will be the show’s creator.

Abrams is a successful show creator. Very successful. Does that make him a good one?

The trick of TV—and I know I’m not breaking new ground here—is encasing characters in prolonged stasis without seeming like that’s what you’re doing. What people consider TV’s golden age is a bunch of creators realizing they didn’t have to do that. Shows like Breaking Bad and The Wire, and even going back to a show like Oz. But the main tract of most TV, even in our #peakTV era, remains the same: making characters remain mostly the same, changing as necessary to keep things interesting.

Our good friend Abrams is really good at that. Add his patented “Mystery Box” technique, putting a strangle hold to your curiosity, and it’s little wonder why he breeds so many successful projects.

The best thing Abrams ever helped create was Lost. He produced other great programs, but with Lost, he was directly involved in the process. After it was picked up, Abrams pretty infamously left to direct Mission Impossible III, and the show fell in the lap of then-rookie showrunner Damon Lindlelof. Carlton Cruse was also brought on as showrunner, and the pair produced much of the show’s greater mythology and narrative. Dissecting the eventual divisive reception of Lost is fairly straightforward: a) those who needed their questions answered and b) those who realized the show’s characters were far more compelling than the greater mystery.

Years later, that initial aesthetic Abrams helped created for Lost, those grand questions—what’s the Smoke Monster? Who are The Others? What the hell’s that island?—barely register as memorable. A younger family member recently binged the show and kept asking me questions along that nature, and I could barely remember the answers, let alone the questions. What I recalled was “Not Penny’s boat” and Jin and Sun Kwon’s love and Desmond’s catchphrase “See you in another life, brotha.” The mystery always fades away. I wish Abrams realized that.

He’s made tons of money and studios trust him more than possibly anyone in Hollywood.

But probably not. He’s made tons of money, produced basically whatever he wants, and studios trust him more than possibly anyone in Hollywood. Why should he?

Here’s the IMDb description for his newest show The Nix: “A son investigates his estranged mother’s secretive past in order to clear her name.” More alluring mystery boxes. More big wonder. But for a guy who loves asking such big, compelling questions, you wished he’d eventually deliver a decent answer.

What I Ate Today: Coquine’s Katy Millard

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2016 has been a banner year for Coquine. The Portland restaurant was named Restaurant of the Year by The Oregonian and one of the 50 Best New Restaurants in America by Bon Appetit. Owner Katy Millard is keeping it all in check; she’s just a regular gal who shops at farmers markets (“I particularly like the Shemanski Park market on Wednesday.”) and spends time with her family on her rare days off (“On my days off I let other people cook.”). Cooking or not, Katy says she is always thinking about food in some fashion: New dishes for the menu, orders to place, what’s coming into season next, what to feed her son, what to plant in her garden. Being a working mom often means eating what’s right in front of you.

Meal #1: Cortado

I love a cortado for my first coffee of the day. I don’t otherwise drink milk drinks, but a cortado in the morning is a treat. It’s an espresso with a small amount of steamed milk, like a small latte (though I like them kinda foamy). I think it reminds me of a galão, which is a similar coffee drink served at cafés in Portugal… only good memories there. I usually just have them at Coquine first thing when I arrive in the morning. On a rare day off I’ll get one at Good Coffee.

Meal #2: Socca

Socca, a chickpea flour pancake, is found everywhere in the south of France. It’s popular street food in Nice, where I spent a lot of time when I lived there. It is traditionally served drizzled with olive oil and topped with lots of fresh ground pepper. It’s a perfect snack for cocktail hour, and a wonderful thing to have in the fridge. The batter lasts for days and cooks up really quickly in a cast iron pan. I love that it’s fast and easy and acts as a vehicle for pretty much anything I have in the fridge. I love topping it with roasted veggies and fried eggs, or leftover grilled chicken and fresh mayo from last night’s barbecue, or just eating it with a salad for a more substantial lunch.

Meal #3: Chicken 

We have roast chicken on the menu at Coquine. We sell them by the half or whole, so sometimes if I’m lucky, there is a rogue half chicken that didn’t get sold leftover at the end of dinner service. We cooks live with the obnoxious fact that there is food everywhere, but most of the time we don’t eat properly. I love that I can snag a leftover chicken leg at the end of the night, though the scene is very unglamorous — me standing by the speed rack in the back of the kitchen, eating a delicious chicken leg before I run out the door to go get my son Hugo from his nanny.

As The NFL Season Begins, A Look At How Football Has Changed

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A sport’s professional, modern version often bares little resemblance to its origins. Most times, they almost look like they’re playing a different sport entirely. But seeing how far we’ve come can reveal startling truths about ourselves and where we’re going. In honor of the NFL’s return this week, we look back at how football came to be.

iPhone 7’s Dumb New Headphone Dongle Inspires Sex Memes

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Apple’s “courageous” decision to eliminate the traditional headphone jack from the iPhone 7 left many people baffled and frustrated, not least because now you’ll need a $40 adaptor to charge your phone while listening to music. What a dumb and bad idea, but also who cares. At least there’s this: A photo of the complicated contraption inspired some new sex memes, a sampling of which you can find below.

https://twitter.com/alanalevinson/status/774226838495305728

https://twitter.com/kashanacauley/status/774262497780068353

https://twitter.com/jesseberney/status/774277514092879872

Nice.

[h/t Gizmodo]

Eat Like They Do In San Diego With Fish Tacos and Margarita Cake

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When I travel, half the amusement is getting my hunt on for regional food and drink.  With the right gusto for exploration, anyone can find unique dishes locals are passionate and proud enough to serve with a story and a smile. In lieu of travel, a savvy cookbook will bring to you the salt, smell and spirit of place.

While working on the California Sol Food Cookbook I became smitten with one of the favorite fares of climate-perfect-Mexico-influenced San Diego: crispy fish tacos.  Now, you too can indulge in this crispy-crunchy-flavor-laden taco recipe representing a San Diego staple. To complete your staycation, a fresh, aromatic and deceptively simple to make ‘margarita’ cake even for non-bakers como yo.

RELATED: Rainy Weather Cocktails

Viajes Felices Mi Amigos!

Fish Tacos 
(makes 12 tacos)

INGREDIENTS

Beer batter:

  • 1 cup flour
  • ½  teaspoon garlic powder
  • ¼ teaspoon red pepper
  • ¼ teaspoon freshly ground
  • black pepper
  • 1 cup beer

White sauce:

  • ½ cup mayonnaise
  • ½ cup plain yogurt

Tacos:

  • vegetable oil for deep-frying
  • 12 (l l/2-ounce) cod fillets or any white fish fillets
  • salt to taste
  • 12 fresh corn tortillas
  • shredded cheddar cheese to taste
  • salsa to taste
  • 1 head green cabbage, shredded
  • lime juice to taste

DIRECTIONS

Batter: Combine the flour, garlic powder, red pepper and black pepper in a bowl and mix well. Whisk the flour mixture into the beer in a bowl until blended.

Sauce: Mix the mayonnaise and yogurt in a bowl.

Tacos: Heat enough oil in a skillet to 375 degrees to deep-fry the fillets. Rinse the fillets and dip in a bowl of lightly salted cold water. Drain and pat dry with paper towels. Coat the fillets with the batter and fry in batches in the hot oil until crisp and golden brown; do not allow the fillets to touch. Drain on paper towels. Heat the tortillas in a skillet until pliable and warm.

ASSEMBLY

Layer each tortilla with 1 fish fillet, shredded cheese, White Sauce, salsa and cabbage and drizzle with lime juice. Fold over to enclose the filling and serve immediately.

Margarita Cake 
(serves 16)

 

Photo courtesy of Frankie Frankeny
Photo courtesy of Frankie Frankeny

 

INGREDIENTS

  • 1 ¾   cups sugar
  • ½  cup ( 1 stick) butter, softened 1 /2 teaspoon baking soda
  • ¼ teaspoon salt
  • 3 eggs
  • 1 Tablespoon grated lemon zest
  • 1 Tablespoon fresh lemon juice 21/2 cups flour
  • 1 cup lemon or plain yogurt

Lime glaze:

  • 1 / 2 cup sugar
  • 2 Tablespoons fresh lime juice (preferably Mexican limes)
  • 1 Tablespoon water
  • 1 Tablespoon tequila

DIRECTIONS

Cake: Preheat the oven to 350 degrees. Combine the sugar, butter, baking soda and salt in a mixing bowl and beat until blended. Add the eggs 1 at a time, beating well and scraping the bowl after each addition. Mix in the lemon zest and lemon juice. Add the flour and yogurt alternately, beating well after each addition.

Spoon the batter into a greased and floured 9x 13-inch cake pan. Bake for 25 to 30 minutes or until a wooden pick inserted in the center comes out clean. Cool in the pan on a wire rack for 15 minutes.

Glaze: Combine the sugar, lime juice and water in a saucepan and mix well. Cook until the sugar dissolves, stirring frequently. Stir in the tequila.

RELATED: Yacht Rock Pairs Perfectly With Cocktails

ASSEMBLY

Invert the warm cake onto a serving platter and brush with the glaze until it is absorbed. Let stand until cool. Slice and garnish each serving with a lime slice and a dollop of whipped cream.

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Named one of the 100 Most Creative People in the US by Entertainment Weekly , Frankie captures images for some of the best names in culinary.  

Frankie has helped create: The Art of the Bar: Cocktails Based on the Classics;The Model Bakery Cookbook; Miette: Recipes from San Francisco’s Most Charming Pastry Shop; The Green Eggs and Ham Cookbook and The Star Wars Cookbook Series. Follow her on Instagram, Facebook and Twitter.Frankie has helped create: The Art of the Bar: Cocktails Based on the Classics;The Model Bakery Cookbook; Miette: Recipes from San Francisco’s Most Charming Pastry Shop; The Green Eggs and Ham Cookbook and The Star Wars Cookbook Series. Follow her on Instagram, Facebook and Twitter.

Frankie has helped create: The Art of the Bar: Cocktails Based on the Classics;The Model Bakery Cookbook; Miette: Recipes from San Francisco’s Most Charming Pastry Shop; The Green Eggs and Ham Cookbook and The Star Wars Cookbook Series. Follow her on Instagram, Facebook and Twitter.

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Fresh Music: Lady Gaga Sounds Lost, But Young Thug And Sia Soar

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With new music flying like warp-speed through the various channels of the Internet, it can be hard to keep up. But worry not! Each week The Fresh Toast will deliver the most-discussed and exciting songs that have recently dropped. Landed. Crashed. And also: soared. Enjoy.

Lady Gaga: “Perfect Illusion”

Lady Gaga wants to be Madonna. That sounds critical, but it’s not: Madonna was one of the biggest and most important pop music artists of the 80s. She was right alongside Prince and Michael Jackson. The flamboyancy and overall persona Lady Gaga embodies is descendant in many ways to Madonna, except Gaga is a theater kid. (Also not a knock against theater kids!)

Like the best pop acts, Gaga blends and reinvents sounds constantly. She works as a collagist as much as a singer. And maybe that’s why Gaga’s newest single “Perfect Illusion” bombards ears like an exasperated sigh. Who wouldn’t want Gaga’s return to explode like fireworks? But that’s not what “Perfect Illusion” is. It sounds like a throwaway from a later-day Madonna album when some producer thought to chase that grand hook/earnest 80s vibes again.

When the track hits its unearned key change, desperately trying to pump some late depth into some surprisingly thin production, it frustrates more than enlivens. It all seemed like a good idea when this song was announced. But with all that production talent behind Gaga, it’s almost like no one wanted to take direction, which is exactly how the song sounds: lost.

Sia ft. Kendrick Lamar: “The Greatest”

https://play.spotify.com/track/3XIIOCu6B8PuGq5j61asEM

This is cathartic. Penned as a tribute to the victims of the Orlando Pulse shooting, the euphoric single is pure pop mastery. Sia teams again with dancer Maddie Ziegler to deliver an equally haunting video, though the video version doesn’t include Kendrick’s verse.

Zack de la Rocha: “digging for windows”

News came that former Rage Against the Machine frontman Zack de la Rocha dropped a new single and it seemed inconceivable. Rage broke up in 2000 and de la Rocha was supposedly recording a solo album, working with El-P, of Run the Jewels fame. Well it turns out de la Rocha remained close to El-P and the first words de la Rocha utters ensures he’s still the rage man. “Fuck that bright shit” and “the days are all night,” we hear against a thumping death march of a beat.

That energy was missed. And apparently we’re going to be hearing a lot more of it soon to come.

https://twitter.com/therealelp/status/773885755210862595

Mac Miller ft. Ariana Grande: “My Favorite Part”

Few rappers or musicians have dabbled in such various modes as Mac Miller. While still too-often dismissed by a certain crowd with a frat rapper label, a genre that made him famous, Mac’s love of all music flows through his own. His next project The Divine Feminine coming next week marks another turn for Mac: some parts neo-soul, others funk, and some jazz backbone. His 2012 You EP, under the guise of Larry Lovestein & The Velvet Revival, displayed he had this in him, but this fusion of feel-good jams he’s been releasing is something else.

“My Favorite Part” joins those ranks, with Mac singing beside new girlfriend Ariana Grande. A laid-back boom-bap, the pair intertwine well together, though that’s little surprise due to their previous collaborations.

Felix Snow ft. Young Thug “Turn Up”

Here’s how Young Thug sounds on this track: unhinged. But unhinged like thrown out of a flying airplane, falling through the sky while rapping his ass off and firing two flamethrowers, only to land on a dragon, also breathing fire, and lightning strikes the pair, trans-morphing them together, until we reach Young Dragon Thug, the maniac rapping on this track.

In other words, it’s Young Thug at his thrilling best.

Andy Milonakis: “Suck Me Off to Drake Songs”

Have a nice weekend.

 

Why Stephen King Is Not Freaked Out By The Crazy Clown Trend

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Three cities in the Carolinas have reportedly been plagued by clowns lurking in the woods, where they’ve tried to lure neighborhood children with promises of candy and other treats. And yet the man who is arguably America’s premier clown expert, Stephen King, remains unfazed by the reports, the authenticity of which he doubts.

“I suspect it’s a kind of low-level hysteria, like Slender Man, or the so-called Bunny Man, who purportedly lurked in Fairfax County, Virginia, wearing a white hood with long ears and attacking people with a hatchet or an axe,” King told the Bangor Daily News. “The clown furor will pass, as these things do, but it will come back, because under the right circumstances, clowns really can be terrifying.”

The Daily News notes that “phantom clown scares” occurred in the 1980s and 90s, but that’s undoubtedly small consolation to the Carolina residents currently living in fear of imminent clown attack.

As you may recall, two weeks ago residents of a Greenville, S.C., apartment complex reported seeing several clowns in their neighborhood. A woman told police she saw “clowns in the woods whispering and making strange noises,” and  some children in the neighborhood told police they “believe the clowns stay in a house located near a pond at the end of a man-made [trail] in the woods.”

If I saw a clown lurking under a lonely bridge, I’d be scared, too.

A week later, residents of an apartment complex in Winston-Salem, N.C, some 175 miles north of Greenville, reported similar clown sightings. One woman told reporters that clowns offered her grandchildren “treats and candy to go into the woods.” Then, two days later, a machete-wielding man reportedly chased a clown into the woods near a Greensboro, N.C, apartment complex.

Of course it’s possible that the reports are all hoaxes or part of some Carolina-apartment-complex-specific mass hysteria. That doesn’t make the idea of regular clown sightings less terrifying. Even King admits as much.

“If I saw a clown lurking under a lonely bridge (or peering up at me from a sewer grate, with or without balloons), I’d be scared, too,” he said.

Posted By: Taylor Berman

Here’s Joy Division’s Ian Curtis Blissing Out On A Roller Coaster, NBD

As the lead singer and songwriter of post-punk, post-everything geniuses Joy Division, Ian Curtis appeared publicly to be a pitch-black soul with wicked cool dance moves. But the truth was that he suffered from epilepsy, which at times contributed to his agitated stage presence, and depression so deep it ultimately lead to his suicide in 1980 at the age of 23. So. Yeah. Happy Friday!

Now, some other genius has taken a slice of Curtis’ wail in “I Remember Nothing,” and mashed it up with 14 seconds of roller-coaster footage to create a mind-bending inside joke that the whole world should be in on. That’s where we come in. Trying to help the whole world get in on the joke–and maybe, just maybe, lead some young, lonely kid to find salvation in the beautifully tragic music Joy Division made. The great irony being that it’s entirely likely that Curtis’ songs have saved many other lives.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mvPIvoJkmGs

Star-Crossed Lovers, Cowboys, Magic, And Dragons: Inside Greg Pak’s New Series, ‘Kingsway West’

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From Planet Hulk to Battlestar Galactica, Greg Pak has produced entertaining work for years now. His run on Action Comics (particularly the non-crossover arcs) were some of the best and original Superman books in recent years.

That said, I didn’t totally love the first issue of Pak’s newest series Kingsway West.

All the parts and pieces are there. The artwork’s great and the writing is good. The story just felt rushed and a little lackluster.

It starts brilliantly with exposition about an alternate history world where Chinese and Mexican Empire’s control the west coast of the United States. They’ve been at war for 13 years prior, fighting for control of a magical substance called Red Gold. Now with the war over, our Chinese protagonist, Kingsway Law, seeks to leave the atrocities of his past behind him.

Photo by Mirko Colak via Dark Horse Comics
Photo by Mirko Colak via Dark Horse Comics

Kingsway is a likeable, albeit standard western hero. A man of few words and quick hands. He guns down some bounty hunters that are after him, but gets injured and rescued by a Mexican woman named Sonia. All good stuff at this point. Star-crossed lovers, cowboys, magic, dragons. This book’s got it all.  Anticipation over watching these two on the run from their respective governments is exciting.

But that doesn’t happen. Nope, the next scene is a five-year flash forward. Sonia and Kingsway are married, but she goes missing and Kingsway makes a new friend named Ah Toy and kills some more soldiers. The second half of the book moves quickly and sets the stage for the rest of the miniseries.

It’s not bad in any sense, exactly. And again, all the pieces are there. It just feels like the sequel to a book that never existed. But it is the debut issue so maybe I’m being harsh and overly critical. I’m just a fan of the slow burn and of world building–and am anxious for a bigger, better world to be built.

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Facebook Boldly Goes With New Like Options to Celebrate #StarTrek50

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If you’re a fan of Star Trek, you’ve probably made celebration plans in one way or another. But Facebook just gave you a few more.

Fans who have shown fandom toward Star Trek or science fiction will receive a slight modification to their “Like” options. A set of Star Trek options will appear instead of the typical emojis. According to Lindsey Shepard, Facebook Messenger’s marketing lead, the company brainstormed plans to celebrate the franchise’s anniversary for some time, eventually settling on the custom emojis.

Facebook’s new like options feature a starry Like, a Vulcan Salute for Love, Captain Kirk for Haha, Spock for Wow, Gordi for Sad, and Klingon for Angry.

Star Trek fans will also receive a custom greeting on Facebook today and have the option to customize their profile picture with a special Star Trek border.

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