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Zoo Worker Ends Up Dead After Attempting Sex With An Alligator

Jimmy Olsen, one of the zoo keepers of the Naples Zoo was found dead in the alligator enclosure on the morning of August 21st. His body was discovered a couple of hours after his death by several employees, who found its dismembered pieces floating around the pool.

Security footage showed just why Olsen died so brutally. Initially, the video showed him having sex with one of the younger and smaller reptiles of the zoo. He was lying on top of the animal, with his pants around his ankles and his back turned to the other reptiles of the enclosure. Not a smart move Jimmy. In this position, Olsen found himself unable to defend himself or even notice when one of the larger reptiles of the pool attacked him, grabbing him by the neck and dragging him to the depths of the water. Experts believe he died very fast.

“The poor guy didn’t stand a chance! We can see him being dragged in the water, then he disappears from sight. He was probably dead within thirty seconds of the attack.”

Said Captain Henri White, spokesman for the Naples Police Department. We’re not sure if we agree with the poor guy part, because wow, this guy just raped a teenage alligator.

Jimmy Olsen was one of the reptile specialists of the Naples Zoo and had been working with the animals for over two years. He’s the first person to die while having sex with an alligator on the zoo, but he’s not the first to be caught engaging in sexual acts with them. A couple of years ago, 3 members of the zoo were condemned after allowing people to have sex with some of their animals. What we can learn from this tale is to stay far, far away from Naples Zoo. And Florida.

Meet The Man Who Rode Out Hurricane Harvey In Pickup Truck

You can’t plan and predict for a hurricane. Oh, people try. Those folks in suits on the television screen tell you what will happen. But what they’re really saying is what they think will happen. Because, like the rest of us, they don’t really know what’s going on.

One Texas couple assumed they knew what to expect when Hurricane Harvey made landfall this past weekend. Bill and Paulette Rogers live in Port Aransas and had lived through worse storms. Harvey was only supposed to be a Category 2 Hurricane when they decided to stay. By the time the storm upgraded to a Category 4, it was too late to leave.

“This is the dumbest thing I’ve ever done,” Bill later told a Dallas News reporter.

As Harvey raged, trees fell through their two-story beach home, forcing them to evacuate to their Ford Focus parked in the garage. When the water rushed in, they retreated to Bill’s white Ford F-250 Super Duty. Trying to maneuver the vehicle to a higher patch of land, debris got lodged in the truck’s axel. So Bill opened the door to see if he could dislodge it.

Via Dallas News:

He stepped onto the running board, and his feet instantly slipped under him, his body claimed by the surge rushing back to the harbor 200 yards in the distance. With all he could muster, he held on to the door and his life. Paulette reached out and grabbed him.

“If you’re dying today,” she remembers saying, “I’m going with you.”

Bill eventually made it back into the truck’s cab and the couple, along with their four dogs, waited out the storm in the truck as water rushed to the couple’s shoulders. They couldn’t move and had nothing to do but wait.

“If you had to pee,” Paulette said, “you just peed.”

Thankfully the Rogers made it out alive. Their house experienced significant damage due to the storm, but what’s important is they made it out alive. What’s worth noting is they never doubted they would.

“Death?” Bill told the Dallas News. “I ain’t afraid of death. What I’m afraid of is the IRS.”

Hopefully Hurricane IRS doesn’t come anytime soon then.

Gossip: Mexico Offers Hurricane Relief To Texas; Kanye West Has Forgotten Who Taylor Swift Is

The Mexican government expressed its solidarity Sunday with the United States following the damage caused by Hurricane Harvey and offered assistance to Texas. Mexico offered to help Texas deal with the disaster, “as good neighbors should always do in trying times.”

On Sunday evening, Foreign Minister Luis Videgaray [photo] and Texas Gov. Greg Abbott spoke by telephone. Carlos Gonzalez Gutierrez, the Mexican consul general in Austin, said he has been in constant communication with the governor’s office to determine how Mexico can best help.

“As we have done in the past, Mexico stands with Texas in this difficult moment,” Gonzalez said. Twelve years ago, following Hurricane Katrina, Mexico sent troops and a vessel filled with food, medicine and water to aid victims in New Orleans.

Kanye West Has Forgotten Who Taylor Swift Is

A source claims Swift, who dumps all over West in her new song “Look What You Made Me Do,” “isn’t even on his radar,” and that Kardashian was under the impression that their feud—if you can even call it that—ended last summer.

Love the fresh dirt we bring over daily from Naughty Gossip? Let us know in the comments!

Can’t Afford $50 Marijuana Tampons? Here’s How To Make Your Own

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Marijuana prohibition remains harshly on the books in many American states and it continues to ruin lives through lack of access as well as enforcement. This is achieved through a myriad of legislative and judicial actions that are carried out against citizens caught burning or eating a plant. In more enlightened locales, companies are rushing to create products catering to a new breed of cannabis consumer: the medical user not looking to get high, many of them women or first time users.

Menstrual pain and cramps are not taken seriously, and are more often joked about than addressed legitimately. Some women experience severe pain during their period while others have no problem at all, and just like many women’s concerns, research isn’t done in great detail. This condition that over 50 percent of the population has once per month, but little is known other than basic hormonal treatments or OTC pain medication, which come with side effects.

Companies like Foria have created a cannabis suppository to address menstrual cramps, the dosage and size look a little concerning. And most importantly: the price is severely prohibitive. Foria claims you cannot get stoned from taking a vaginal suppository, but from personal experience I think that 72mg of THC is enough to get anybody stoned through a membrane like the vag.

A product of this nature can easily be made at home to a much more suitable-for-everyone dosage and price. With just three ingredients, you can make this to your own specifications and share with your friends. Suddenly everybody can have a better time of the month!

To Make This Product You Need To Sail The C’s Of Cannabis Infusion:

Cocoa Butter- ½ cup

Coconut Oil – ¼ cup

Cannabis- 1 gram of concentrate (can be equivalent amount of raw bud, roughly 5 grams)

Clean- Probably the most important thing, since you will be shoving this up your jaybird. Quickly blanch any plant matter with boiling water (it’s not hot enough to cause potency loss), strain, and dry. Skip this step if using wax or hash.

Convert- Heat finely ground material to 225 degrees fahrenheit to convert THC-A, which is inactive, to its psychoactive auntie we all love, THC. This action is precisely what happens when you smoke, the flame and combustion transfers all of the cannabinoids to their most active form which enter through tissues in the mouth, throat, and lungs. For topical use, it needs to be converted for maximum pain relief.

Cover- ALWAYS keep material covered or sealed when heating above boiling. Vapor lost is potency lost.

Careful- ALWAYS stay below 350 degrees anything higher will boil the cannabinoids which are close the the boiling point of most cooking oils.

To Make Cannabis Infused Coconut Oil:

Put ¼ cup coconut oil in a clean mason jar with your starting material.

Seal the Mason jar and placed in a warm water bath for 1 hour.

Cool the Mason jar to room temperature and place in a freezer overnight.

The next day, defrost and place in a water bath once more, just to heat through.

Strain if using raw cannabis. If using a concentrate or hash you won’t have to strain the material.

To Make Marijuana Pain Melts (Not Just For Periods!):

Melt 1/4 cup cocoa butter in the microwave short bursts until fully melted. Add the warmed infused coconut oil and stir well.

Quickly pour into a candy mold or ice cube tray. Alternatively, you can pour it into a tin and use as a topical rub. Allow to cool until set before digging in.

The best way to determine a suitable dose is to start with one small piece at a time. Putting one internally and rubbing one externally on your abdomen works great for a n00b. If you don’t feel any relief within 15 minutes, trying a second chip and so on until you feel better will tell you an ideal dose for your body. The dosage for one single chip is so small that you likely won’t get intoxicated unless you were to eat it. As you can see by the ingredients, you can do so without concern. There has never been anything that has worked faster and hasn’t caused any side effects other than using cannabis to address cramps in my personal opinion.

This makes enough product to last at least four really bad periods, using daily for three days and maybe six mild ones, less time if you’re generous and share with friends, which is always good vibes.

These little melts also make amazing muscle rub for any other body aches and pains. If you are feeling particularly witchy, you can use essential oils to spike your recipe if you won’t be using it internally, like your own weed Tiger Balm!

Cannabinoids have been being used for generations for all types of ailments. In many cultures it’s the first grab for menstrual and muscle aches, before the over the counter drugs that America markets to death.

You would think that men would just want women to have no more cramps so that they would never have to hear about it again, but alas keeping people in jail and keeping people’s pockets fat is more important than simple cures made from simple things that keep everybody happy.

Photos: Maria Penaloza & Danielle Guercio

The Fresh Toast Marijuana Legislative Roundup: August 28

Last week in cannabis news, Nevada officials continue to wrangle over distribution. Meanwhile regulators in Alaska and Denver continue looking at the possibility of cannabis lounges. Find out about this and more in our weekly marijuana legislative roundup.   

Nevada:  

On Monday, the Department of Taxation announced that it will not issue cannabis distribution licenses to any businesses other than liquor wholesalers until after it hears an administrative appeal from a group of wholesalers on August 29. A unique provision of Nevada’s marijuana legalization law gives exclusive rights to transport marijuana to liquor wholesalers. However, the Department of Taxation decided earlier this year that there was insufficient interest among liquor wholesalers to meet demand for recreational cannabis. After a lengthy judicial process that threatened supplies for Nevada’s booming marijuana industry, a Carson City judge ruled the prior week that the Department could proceed in offering distributor licenses to non-liquor wholesalers in order to meet demand. However, the Department of Taxation has agreed to delay issuing licenses until the formal appeal is heard. Supply shortages have led to an estimated 20-30 percent decline in marijuana sales since the initial boom following the July 1 start of recreational sales.   

 Alaska:  

Last week, the Alaska Marijuana Control Board began accepting public comment on a draft regulatory proposal to allow adults to consume marijuana at licensed facilities. The draft rules would allow marijuana businesses to operate lounges at which the plant could be consumed, but not purchased or sold. Municipalities would be able to protest the granting of a license to any applicant within their jurisdiction. Cannabis retailers and the City of Anchorage have been advocating such a measure to allow tourists to consume marijuana without fear of legal repercussions. The public comment period closes on October 27.  

Denver:  

Last week, Denver regulators began accepting applications from businesses seeking to allow public marijuana consumption on their premises. Last November, voters approved a measure to allow certain businesses to operate marijuana lounges, where cannabis could be consumed but not sold. Implementation was delayed due to the state legislature’s passage of a bill banning marijuana consumption on the premises of businesses with a liquor license. The four-year pilot program will be the first of its kind in the nation, though it will be restricted to coffee shops, yoga studios, and certain other businesses.  

7 Essential Dorm Room Cooking Hacks So You Won’t Starve To Death In College

Answer: College. Question: What do you call four years of having absolutely no privacy, personal space, and possibly sunshine?

There’s no question about it. Dorm rooms suck. Some are so small there’s not even room for a microwave. That’s why lists like these exist — to get you thinking about how to make snacks and meals to get you through your day with nothing but bare essentials. If college is anything, it’s a place to learn how to be resilient when the odds are against you. At the very least, you’ll be a great camper once you live in a dorm for a while.

Grow Your Own Herbs

For small spaces with little light, you want to choose herbs that thrive in those types of situations. Chives, parsley and Vietnamese coriander (cilantro) are pretty easy. Read on for tons more tips.

Take Advantage Of Your Coffee Maker.

The same hot plate that keeps your coffee warm can also make your breakfast. If you have a small skillet, place it on the warming plate. If you’re not in a hurry, it also works for pancakes!

You can also make hard-boiled eggs by placing some eggs in the actual coffee pot, filling it with water, and using the hot plate to boil the water. It takes about 10 minutes to cook the eggs. You can also cook ramen the same way. Here’s a great video that shows you how to use the basket of a coffee maker to steam veggies!

 

No Bake Desserts FTW

Desserts that don’t require any cooking usually don’t require refrigeration. Here are some no-bake cookie recipes to get you started (some of which only have a few ingredients).

Stock Up On Seasoning Packets

Next time you buy ramen or anything else that comes with a flavor pack it, stock up. Or just go buy some at your local Asian grocery store.

Those seasoning packets can make any bland meal exceptional.

Make A Bag-O-Nachos

Or a “walking taco bowl” if you will. Just open a bag of Doritos or Fritos, add some of your favorite toppings (avocado, cheese, beans, hot sauce), close the bag, shake it up, and head to class. Make sure you bring some mints with you tho.

https://www.instagram.com/p/3m8A9vlwPf

Get A Waffle Iron

And then make these “no waffle” waffle iron recipes from SheKnows that include everything from cinnamon buns, PB&J, and poblano and cheese quesadilla.

Get A Regular Iron

Not only will it keep your clothes looking fresh (even if they’re not), you can make yourself panini sandwiches or grilled cheese. Assemble the sandwich, wrap in foil and iron your way to a gooey, melty grilled cheese. You can also make French toast. (If you don’t want to use a plant-based milk, obviously you can use dairy. But please, skip the eggs! That’s just a mess waiting to happen).

Gossip: Angelina Jolie Going Broke; Is Adele Pregnant?

Angelina Jolie’s REFUSAL to do big budget, commercial films is affecting her bank account!

An insider says her overhead for her properties, security etc is eating up her savings. BUT the insider adds she “loathes” doing “big Hollywood films.”

Fresh Buzz In Hollywood Says That Adele Is Pregnant

There is some FRESH buzz in Hollywood that Adele is pregnant with baby # 2!

“ADELE has been trying to have another baby for a while. This wouldn’t be a big surprise,” a pal tells NAUGHTY GOSSIP. “After the tour she said she wanted to retire for a while and get away from music and focus on her family. She keeps secrets and if she is pregnant she will not tell everyone until she wants to.”

Love the fresh dirt we bring over daily from Naughty Gossip? Let us know in the comments!

Green Rush: Investors Continue To Throw Millions At Marijuana

Silicon Valley venture firms like the heralded Benchmark Capital, which brought us such internet/app gems as Twitter, Instagram, Snapchat and more, are always looking for the latest, hottest trends. Which, naturally, led them to cannabis. California’s legalization laws go into effect on January 1st, and the money is already rolling in.

Benchmark dropped a cool $8 million into Hound Labs, an Oakland startup that’s developing a real time cannabis intoxication test so that drivers and the police that pull them over have a way to prevent buzzed driving.

They are merely a drop in the bucket, however. California’s pot profits are expected to reach six and a half billion dollars by 2020 and it is truly the era of the green rush. Experts say that other legal states, like Colorado and Washington, were practically testing grounds for California, the world’s sixth largest economy.

Eager backers are investing tens of millions into new-fangled medicinal products, like new vaping methods, new transdermal patches and of course apps.

Cofounder of PayPal Peter Thiel put $300,000 into the California ballot that did pass and is now bringing recreational cannabis to the Golden State. Now Thiel has given over millions to Privateer Holdings, a Seattle based private equity firm that researches medical weed products and to a slew of other cannabis related ventures.

California going legal is predicted to inspire more states to go the green route as well. Let’s be honest, the initial pot legalization proving grounds have already shown bolstered economies and no rises in youth use of the herb. They’re raking in tax revenues for schools, roads, law enforcement, drug abuse treatment and other social and infrastructural enterprises.

The snag? The federal government still classifies marijuana as a Schedule I drug – one with a high potential for abuse and with no recognized medical value. Yet, most of the United States have already legalized various forms of medical uses and seven states plus Washington D.C. have legalized it.

Most major biotech companies have shied away from cannabis, partially because its Schedule I status means difficult to no access to banking. Plus, most large venture firms get moneys from pension funds and public companies, so risk and morality clauses factor in.

The profits are there to be made, though, and many individual investors are jumping right in. L.A. based private equity firm MedMen has conjured up around $80 million for marijuana ventures and recently held their first investor’s conference in San Jose.

As the questionably legal landscape opens, it’s ironic and sad that some are pulling out their millions while others sit in jails and prisons for the same idea, but we can only hope that these venture companies continue to lend credibility to the growing green industry and that common sense from both our government and our people will allow the green rush to flow on and its prisoners to be set free.

4 Major Illnesses CBD Oil Can Soothe

CBD is great for improving your health. The oil that’s produced from it offers many health benefits like improving mental health, promoting mental clarity, and improving your overall nervous system.

According to CannLabs, the leading lab that tests and experiments with cannabis, there’s no way to overdose on CBD which means that you can take a couple of drops several times a day without having to worry over it.

Here are 4 conditions where CBD provides the most relief:

Cancer

Chemotherapy, the leading means to combat the disease, is known for its awful side effects, one of them being loss of appetite. CBD oil is a great remedy for this, improving your appetite and helping your body cope with weight loss and low energy.

Chronic Pain

Chronic pain is one of the most common diseases that americans struggle with, affecting around 100 million of adults. CBD promotes healthy joint development, nourishes and relaxes muscles, promotes organ function and provides pain relief. CBD is also well known for its effect on inflammation, one of the main causes of chronic pain.

Epilepsy

A study conducted on 137 victims of epilepsy demonstrated that the use of Epidiolex, a pharmaceutical version of CBD oil extract, helped them control and decrease their symptoms of seizures.  

Sleep Disorders

Blue lights, too much work and long commutes prevent americans from getting enough sleep every day, making around 70 million people in the US suffer from some sort of sleeping disorder. Several studies have demonstrated CBD’s positive effect on helping PTSD patients get a better night’s rest. Another study conducted on male rats demonstrated that CBD made them sleep for longer periods of time.

These Cannabis Baking Kits Will Soon Be A Thing

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If you like the idea of making your own edibles, but aren’t too sure how to actually get started, there’s a new herbal baking delivery kit service out of New York that might just be the missing link in your canna quest. Baking Supply Co. has come up with “healthy baking kits for herbal enthusiasts” — pre-portioned and refrigerated boxes delivered to your door. Think Blue Apron for cannabis lovers.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BYJsUhGDzkA

The company launched  an Indiegogo campaign in hopes of raising $22,000 to get their idea going. The ingredients are sourced from local farmers and contain zilch gluten or refined sugars, which makes the cost of these boxes a little spendy (you’ll need to supply your own weed).

Each box ($40) includes step-by-step instructions on how to make infused baked goods with the intention of not overwhelming the newbie baker. And according to Ali Francis, who owns the company with her brother, there is also an interactive recipe for herbal butter to ensure your edibles will “come out perfect every time.”

Check out the trippy campaign video below. They hope to meet their financial goal by September.

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